Mission Mission

The Yum Diary got the scoop from some workmen fixing up the now-empty space:

“What’s going to move in here?” I shouted. (They were really pretty far back there.)

“The Burger Mister!” the elder fellow shouted back.

“The Burger Mister?”

“Yes, the Burger Mister!” he asserted.

[pause, thinking]

“Oh, you mean Burgermeister?” I asked.

“Yes! Yes! The Burgermeister!”

Link. But this still doesn’t answer the more pressing question.

Update: ERRONEOUS!! Thanks, Tracie! Sorry, everybody.

Bronstein at Large interviewed actor Sam Rockwell the other day, and Rockwell, who grew up in and around SF, basically did nothing but gush about the Mission. Look for talk of Zeitgeist, Farolito and Pancho Villa. Also, something about his cock. Raw, 24-minute version here. (via SFist’s Day Around the Bay)

Johnny0 from Burrito Justice has the scoop on some injustice regarding taco trucks and Mission District high schools:

The drama increases — apparently the sups passed a law banning “mobile food establishments” to enforce a “wellness policy” to protect school lunch programs. Except that…

- only seniors can go off campus for lunch
- NO students were actually going to the truck
- the principal *did* go to the truck for lunch
- the SEIU is involved
- I somehow doubt school lunches have improved much from my memories of Reagan-era “ketchup is a vegetable”, mountains of gov’t cheese and “pizza day”…

Link. Oh snap! If the principal knows what’s up, then…

This heartbreaking reenactment is the latest from Imsoooconfused, our favorite vlog.

This prehistoric beast reportedly stalked someone’s birthday party last weekend. Any thoughts on its origin? Was anyone hurt? What can we do to keep our families safe?

Photo by art.bikes.

Previously on Mission Mission:

Humanoid Ghostbat Sighted

This guy Will Yackulic had an exhibition at Adobe Books years ago called Finest Pure, and he did the cover art for a poetry compendium I got at Needles + Pens called Le Palais de Nuit. Back then, he worked with cubes and pyramids, whereas now it looks like he’s into triangles and spheres. Libby at Libby’s Niche interviewed Yackulic and got him to talk about his process (which these days sometimes involves typewriters) and cool places to go in NYC. He also uses some cool words I’ve never heard before like “phosphene.” Link.

More Will Yackulic at Gregory Lind Gallery.

New at Hamburger Eyes.

Reader Cleezy Clapback needs some advice:

We moved into a duplex on 20th and Treat (yikes!) in June, and the occupants upstairs are all close friends of mine. The landlord agreed to repair some presumably negligible problems with the house, and we were fine with the verbal agreement. 3 months later nothing had happened, and things started to fall apart. After contacting the Rent Board, our landlord was notified and, shortly after, contacted someone to fix the house. One thing led to the other, yada yada yada, they ripped up the entire floor of the living room and kitchen, replaced the shower, and knocked out an entire living room wall.

After living without a wall for a week, the Building Inspector visited me, stating that their has been NO permits filed with the City for the construction. The construction workers left. Now their is a gaping hole in our wall, no floor, and no electricity in the living room. What’s next? Are we going to be evicted? Relocated? Am I responsible for the cost of relocation? Dear God, help us.

God, readers, what’s the deal?

Reader Bryan Haggerty says, “Thought you guys might appreciate this apartment listing on craigslist.” We’re printing the full text in case it gets flagged, despite its being REAL:

$1000 Room 4 Rent in San Francisco’s Mission District (mission district)

Hellooooo there! We are three of the most super duper coolest people in the world looking for a reallllyyy cool roomate to stay at our house on 17th and Valencia St. in San Francisco.

The room is approximately 10 x 10 feet. Hardwood floors throughout the home with an incredible view of the street action on 16th and Mission BART.

A little about us…

Dexter is a super cool 28 year old dude. He wears black square framed glasses. A bike messenger, he is utterly sure of himself that the right thing to do in a city like San Francisco where the citizens and workers are overwhelmingly for more biker paths and public transportation is to protest in the streets against them. He works 24 hours a week and then hangs out at Zeitgeist because it’s a “Biker Bar,” and spends the rest of his time updating his myspace page and posting threads about “Loose Change” on message boards. The son of two lawyers, he has a fierce commitment to social justice. He believes it is the governments job to send every African American and Latino Child to school although he chooses not to go himself. He knows the plight of black people because at 8 years old, he went to school with a black kid named Trevor in Marin.

Janis is a 32 year old ballet teacher. She wears black framed glasses. A ballet teacher, she was always warned by her parents that teaching ballet would be a great part time job and hobby as opposed to one of those jobs you can do from home but chose the independent road and did so anyways. Her friends told her it was admirable but she needed real income to stick with it in a city like San Francisco. Luckily, she only needs to teach ballet for 12 hours a week because she moved into our apartment 14 years ago and is covered by rent control. What she is not able to cover, her architect father pays for. Her mother dissapeared several years ago but occasionally paints pictures by covering her body with paint and flying across a zipline like that chick in The Big Lebowski.

I, Ronald, am a 29 year old caucasian member of MECHA. I volunteer with the organizaion to give a one sided, completely biased story about why California should be a part of Mexico. When I ask Mexican immigrants wheter California should be part of the US or Mexico they overwhelmingly say the US. This is my inspiration to teach them differently. I wear black framed glasses. I have two tattoos on my back with Chinese characters. I recently learned one artist changed the Chinese character “Strength” to “Fuck You Stupid Whiteboy” when he tattoed me but I suppose it was a learning experience. My dad is a police officer. He arrests people who kill people and sell drugs to kids. While this may sound good, they are overwhelmingly minority, and therefore he is just a racist pig who is part of the system. My mother makes six figures as a hairstylist but I’m upset she’s so stupid she would cramp her mind to that.On my spare time I enjoy listening to Cold Play because it makes me think about killing myself and drawing flowers with sidewalk chalk to remind my neighbors what a beautiful life it is in a neighborhood where people are killed on a weekly basis and transients like myself stay inside my home and dont help any of the young kids who need it.

Collectively, you must know: we are vegetarian. Eating meat is completely immoral, no matter how delicious. Except fish. And eggs. And carne asada burritos. We enjoy sports, but not baseball, football, or basketball. Soccer is okay. Or something more European. You must be liberal to live here. You must be completely open and in agreement to our point of view. If you drive a car forget it. Cars are evil. It doesnt matter if you have family in the East Bay and work in San Jose, its completely unacceptable if you think you actually have to commute to work. You should listen to Jack Johnson too.

Rent is $1,000 dollars cause we are super cool.Forward us your myspace so we can judge you. As you can see we are pretty normal, excepting,down to Earth people, and if you arent the same you should move somewhere else.

Thanks.

Oh yea dont flag THIS IS REAL.

Is it? Link, or click thumbnail above for screenshot. Thanks, Bryan!

The Free Farm Stand is still on the lookout for some help with its mission to bring sustainably raised produce to neighborhood families at no cost:

I picked almost the last of the kale from the Secret Garden and this time it was very popular and I had no trouble giving it away. It is still the best bang for the buck in terms of growing lots of nutrition in a small place and it is very reliable. I also had lettuce, tomatoes, and chilies from several gardens and purple beans that came from a neighbor (who also brought tomatoes and chilies). It has been hard keeping up with planting and growing a lot of vegetables, and part of that is not having enough space to grow a lot more food and part of that is needing more help, especially if I could find someone whom I can train to take on more responsibilities.

Any wannabe interns out there?

Link.