I’m a hipster

Our buddy Primo, commenting on that whole NYC hipster trap project, may have just offered up the most solid take on the age-old hipster debate. This just might end it all once and for all:

before everybody got lost

A. hipster=weird person musician artist poet etc
B . pink sunglasses+ neon bike chain + pbr +etc etc=urban outfitters clone…

the disappearence of the middle class continues to make Americans into bitchy clods but i’m a hipster and that’s why i live in the city, to make art and have fun, eat it

or move to Antioch or some shit where boring white people all get along

I’m a hipster. Eat it.

Thanks, Primo!

15 Responses to “I’m a hipster”

  1. Pedro says:

    kuddos to preems. he’s self-aware.

    but antioch is just racist! http://www.nytimes.com/2008/08/09/us/09housing.html

    • kusfwtf says:

      might want to actually read that article. aside from some white woman being afraid of a group of young black males (shocker!) it really doesn’t prove that an entire city is racist. studies actually backed up that when low income renters moved to a “better” neighborhood they brought their criminal activities with them. interesting article nonetheless, thanks.

  2. ciao says:

    but isn’t the first rule that if you identify as a hipster then you definitely aren’t one?

  3. the dude says:

    except that you didn’t follow this up with jeff’s reply, which was far more accurate:

    I disagree, Pp. I think that:

    A. bohemian= weird person musician artist poet etc.
    B. hipster= rather normal young person from an affluent family trying to fool people into believing that she or he is a bohemian.

    • whir says:

      So rich kids can’t be bohemian? How about Lord Byron? Exactly what income level is required for the maximum authenticity?

      • saywhatnow says:

        lord byron? really? me thinks he just rolled over in his grave.

        • moderniste says:

          Lord Byron was *totally* an 18th/19th century hipster. He was a dandy and a partier, and he even had a bunch of goth friends in Percy and Mary Shelley.

  4. 0101 says:

    the term hipster is not a new word at all and has nothing to do with affluence, more of a lifestyle thing, in my opinion.

    Kerouac mentions hipsters in On the Road when he’s reminiscing about New York.

    and bohemians were orignially a private society of businessmen (or something to that effect), check the SF Bohemian club

    • Jeremy says:

      actually, the SF bohemiam club was ORIGINALLY a club of artist and creative types that got so trendy that it was co-opted by the robber barons of the day.

      But thanks for playing.

  5. SCUM says:

    I’ve fallen and broke my hipster.

  6. Corpus Nerd says:

    Are You A Hipster? Take the quiz and find out!

    1. The Rapture is

    a) What happens at the end of the world

    b) Not as good as Moving Units

    c) A new brand of Jeans

    d) Why I go to church

    e) Overrated

    2. The Postal Service is

    a) What I use to mail things

    b) Ben Gibbard’s side project

    c) A punk band

    d) A new coffee shop

    e) A website

    3. Screaming Females is

    a) My favorite porn site

    b) A new ride at Six Flags

    c) The best new band of 2010

    d) An S&M club

    e) A kind of candy

    4. Converse is

    a) What I do at dinner

    b) Not as cool as vintage cowboy boots

    c) What I have been wearing since 1992

    d) Inappropriate attire for my workplace, home, or school

    e) Cooler if you wear Jack Purcells

    5. Thurston Moore is

    a) A 16th century English Baron

    b) A writer for Warner Brothers

    c) A catcher for the Seattle Mariners

    d) A God

    e) My friend on MySpace

    6. Calvin Johnson is

    a) A true poet of the age

    b) A wide receiver for the Detroit Lions

    c) A guy I went to high school with

    d) An insurance broker

    e) An idiosyncratic modification of a soy chai latte

    7. I wear vintage clothes because

    a) I’m poor

    b) It’s a way of protesting consumerism

    c) It’s funny

    d) I shop at Macy’s

    e) Used clothing is gross

    8. I ride a

    a) Cinelli

    b) Vespa

    c) Mo-Ped

    d) Chevy Trailblazer

    e) Bus

    9. Emo is

    a) A word for spoon in the Eskimo language

    b) A large flightless bird that lives in Australia

    c) A religion founded by Ian MacKaye

    d) My own personal style

    e) I have no idea

    10. I’m vegan because

    a) It’s wrong to eat animals

    b) It’s cool to be really skinny

    c) I’m not vegan

    d) I had a hamburger for lunch

    e) I volunteer for PETA

    11. I studied _______ in college

    a) Business

    b) Criminology

    c) Biology

    d) Graphic Design

    e) American Literature

    12. South By Southwest is

    a) The best Alfred Hitchcock film

    b) Not as cool as it used to be

    c) Where I met my husband or wife

    d) A real estate convention

    e) The direction in which I walk to get to 7-11

    13. PBR is

    a) My favorite beer

    b) A good beer for the price

    c) The most ethical beer based on it’s ties to unions

    d) Not as cool as it used to be

    e) A terrible drink that only stupid and poor people would buy

    14. Levi’s jeans are:

    a) For yuppies desperately trying to prove their American-ness

    b) Not as cool as Cheap Monday or Nudie Jeans

    c) I try and buy vintage and usually remove any labels because it’s more authentic

    d) Inappropriate attire for my workplace, home, or school

    e) On sale at Urban Outfitters

    15. Myspace is

    a) A place for friends

    b) Still a good place to put out your band’s music and network with other musicians

    c) Inappropriate for my workplace, home, or school

    d) Not as cool as Friendster

    e) Where I meet prostitutes

    16. Make Out Club is

    a) A bar

    b) An underground kissing club

    c) Where I met my husband or wife

    d) I have no idea

    e) An online social network that was cooler than Myspace and Friendster and Facebook combined

    17. Eminem is

    a) Stupid

    b) My favorite musician

    c) A candy that melts in your mouth

    d) Noteworthy for his work with Dr. Dre

    e) Inappropriate for my workplace, home, or school

    18. Urban Outfitters is

    a) Where I shop

    b) For young people

    c) Revolutionizing the fashion industry

    d) For posers

    e) What is Urban Outfitters?

    19. Blogging is

    a) A waste of time

    b) Fun

    c) Where I write poetry

    d) A serious breach of personal privacy

    e) How I make a living!

    20. Green Day is

    a) Something to do with St. Patrick’s Day

    b) The best punk band ever

    c) Somehow becoming cool again in a highly and unexpected circular fashion

    d) The way I mark my calendar when I start my diet

    e) Annoying because the lead singer uses a fake British accent


    1. a) 1 b) 5 c) 3 d) 2 e) 4
    2. a) 1 b) 5 c) 3 d) 2 e) 4
    3. a) 1 b) 4 c) 5 d) 3 e) 2
    4. a) 2 b) 4 c) 5 d) 1 e) 3
    5. a) 2 b) 3 c) 1 d) 5 e) 4
    6. a) 5 b) 1 c) 3 d) 2 e) 4
    7. a) 3 b) 4 c) 5 d) 2 e) 1
    8. a) 4 b) 3 c) 5 d) 1 e) 2
    9. a) 3 b) 2 c) 5 d) 4 e) 1
    10. a) 5 b) 4 c) 1 d) 2 e) 3
    11. a) 1 b) 2 c) 3 d) 4 e) 5
    12. a) 3 b) 4 c) 5 d) 1 e) 2
    13. a) 2 b) 3 c) 4 d) 5 e) 1
    14. a) 4 b) 2 c) 5 d) 1 e) 3
    15. a) 3 b) 5 c) 2 d) 4 e) 1
    16. a) 2 b) 3 c) 5 d) 1 e) 4
    17. a) 5 b) 2 c) 3 d) 4 e) 1
    18. a) 4 b) 2 c) 3 d) 5 e) 1
    19. a) 1 b) 4 c) 3 d) 2 e) 5
    20. a) 3 b) 2 c) 5 d) 1 e) 4

    Your Hipster Rating:

    90-100 Total Hipster: You’d better go grab some vegetarian sushi and a few cases of cheap beer because guests are about to start arriving at your house show/indie label showcase with significant industry reps arriving at any minute. Hurry!

    85-95: Cool Person: You have good instincts, but you’re not paying attention! You need to go to more shows and hang out with more musicians to achieve better style.

    75-85: Nerd or Yuppie: If you really want to be a hipster, quit your job and start a rock band or go to art school. It might mean a pay cut, but you will look and act cooler.

    60-75: Working Adult Professional: You have no instincts for sub-culture. You are boring, but you run the world. Good for you!

    60 or below: Normal: Why are you reading this?

  7. Corpus Nerd says:

    Oops I posted the wrong totals — 80-90 = Cool Person, 70-80 = Nerd or Yuppie, 60-70 = Working Adult Professional, 60 or below = Normal

  8. getalife says: