Dolores Park I love you, but you’re bringing me down

Honey In Yr Brain doesn’t understand why all we ever do on nice days is go to Dolores:

There are other big, huge lots of grass in SF with much better views and not as many piss-poor onesies than Dolores Park..SOME WITH PLENTY OF TREES TOO. There are beaches, hills, pools, docks, parks, reservoirs, lakes, rivers…ALL OF WHICH I HAVE FAILED TO SEE BECAUSE I don’t know ANYONE who actually goes to bed at a reasonable hour to wake the fuck up in time to make it to one of these BETTER options.

I love you Dolores Park, but the amount of tall cans I can drink in you hung over “JUSS’ CUZ IT’S NICE OUT” is running dry.

Blam! Real talk? Or what?

She then goes on to ask for volunteers to join her on her mission to try something new. Read on.

[Photo by Man Freckles]

P.S. Whoa, this is the second time I gave a post this exact title. I’d totally forgotten. Here is the first.

29 Responses to “Dolores Park I love you, but you’re bringing me down”

  1. Plz stay exactly where you are; I don’t need you to be stinking-up my space in the entire rest of this huge, excessively mapped-and-cataloged city.

  2. Corpus Nerd says:

    The hipster apocalypse has always been introverted and and often heroin-based. If you’re bored, try doing more drugs!

  3. d says:

    I think it’s funny how she blames her friends for the fact that she’s failed to see all these other lovely spots in the city. Maybe go by yourself? Take a date to one of these spots? And why do people have to wake up early to see these spots?

    If you’re mad at your friends, don’t take it out on DP.

    • Honey In Yr Brain says:

      Well mr sir let me tell’s because I have actually done several of these things alone and honestly, doing things alone gets boring. And trust me..I have bugged my boyfriend to take me to somewhere else that isn’t Dolores on a nice day and he has just called me cranky. Face it…twenty-something year olds are lazy.

      Also, you do need to leave quite early in the day (and when I say early I mean before 3pm ok…you don’t understand the fact that my friends fail at not going out past 3am which resorts into sleeping-forever-sundays).

      I mean yeah sometimes it works out and we do go somewhere else but I hate it when like 95.5% of the time it’s all talk and then people just settle with going to DP when nice days are sort of rare here.

  4. ciao says:

    first world problems. don’t be afraid to enjoy this city without a crew in tow.

  5. Tom in SFCA says:

    So what is a “piss-poor onesie”?

  6. pedro says:

    i had fun 2 years ago when it was more about eating sandwiches, reading books, and watching dogs. now it’s like revolution cafe moved to dolores park. i’m overwhelmed with it’s djs, drum circles, and blonde dreds. burnores park? it’s also a very privileged situation, and not very diverse. if it was all mexicans, or black folks drinking and “chillen” at the park, i’m sure it would be different story. i like the park, but can only take it in doses.

    • EH says:

      Thanks for explaining that “diverse” means brown.

      • pedro says:

        the truth is uncomfortable. diveristy does include a mixed income situation. but who has the luxury of having the weekends off to just lay in the grass for 4 hours drinking booze, and dressing up as chinese recycle ladies during Halloween?

      • pedro says:

        diverse should include “brown” and all types of socio-economic backgrounds.

    • ciao says:

      there’s a lot of diversity in the park, people from all kinds of ethnic and economic backgrounds as well as different sexual orientations and lifestyles. if it were all Mexicans or all black folks are all of any other single minority, it would NOT be diverse. that’s, by definition, the opposite.

      • pedro says:

        ciao. clearly you don’t understand what i’m saying. it was two separate thoughts, but thanks for providing me a definition of diversity.

        • ciao says:

          i’ll just quote what i was responding to and you can let me know the intended interpretation:

          “it’s also a very privileged situation, and not very diverse. if it was all mexicans, or black folks drinking and “chillen” at the park, i’m sure it would be different story.”

      • pedro says:

        i love when troll conversations turn into debates on definitions of words. it’s just like high school english class.

    • Jane says:

      +1. Pedro always brings the real talk.

  7. generic says:

    Jefferson Square is this really obscure park in Western Addition that you’ve probably never heard of.

  8. tofupuppy says:

    Had this problem yesterday. Tried to rally folks to play croquet in Golden Gate (where large expanses of flat green are available) and had an almost unanimous retort of “Why can’t we just go to Dolores?”

  9. Jake says:

    Oh god, hipster-life crisis. You’re growing up, quick, move to NOPA.

  10. lionette says:

    I’m going to have to go with d) all of the above. You all called it. However, Jake speaks the truth!

    I went to DP for the first time yesterday and I know this may not be saying much but I’m a SF native, and although I did enjoy myself it did seem a bit ridiculous. I’ve spent a week day afternoon there by myself just reading a book but I’ve never been there on a warm weekend day. It’s out of hand. I saw a brawl, drum circles, millions of fixies and enough smug expressions that it was all so bad, it was hilarious. Don’t get me started on the bathroom line.

  11. SCUM says:

    I like the fact that all the filth gathers in one spot. Makes it easy to avoid them.

  12. Mr. BadAdvice says:

    There’s a bathroom at DP? I just piss on whoever’s closest.

  13. Your mom says:

    Pedro = WINNING!!
    I challenge someone to take a poll of the socio-economic backgrounds and education levels at brolores park on any given day…..serious…Burning Man has one…it’s heelarious