Even Mission News is rebranding to keep up with the times

According to Capp Street Crap, the iconic porn shop is revamping for a less seedy look, apparently taking design cues from Good Vibrations:

The decades-old shop near 17th and Mission streets is also being renamed Mission Secrets, all part of an effort, according to manager James Aragon, to attract more female clientele. This week, the store’s previously blue exterior was being painted beige, the interior had been lightened up, and a worker had taken down its trademark “Adult Superstore” sign. Those giant, suggestive and utterly ridiculous pictures of a man and woman that used to flank the front door, had also been covered up.

Aragon said the remodel is not to draw in more of the Mission’s moneyed residents, just to make the store more inviting to passersby.

“You have your good and bad,” he said, adding that more police presence seems to have brought more weekend foot traffic to his stretch of Mission Street. “During the weekends you have a lot of people, a lot of women walking around.”

According to Aragon, the store has begun carrying hosiery, more sex toys geared to women, and will soon have a display in the front window with a mannequin modeling the lingerie it has begun selling. On Friday, the area behind the cashier had been wallpapered and two fake orchids hung on shelves on either side of an ornate mirror. With upgrades, however, comes higher costs. Aragon said the store’s viewing booths will go from $5 to $10 and there will be a $15 all-day pass.

Boy, I’m gonna miss seeing that iconic storefront and signage from the Secret Alley. Read on for more photos and a quote about the “riff raff” in the neighborhood.

[First photo via Yelp]

The African Outlet closed their doors; new location in the works

The normally jam packed African Outlet in Hayes Valley has completely emptied out, and according to their facebook page and IndieGoGo campaign, they are looking for help to relocate, possibly to the Bay View. They claim to be just looking for a larger space, but it seems like this has been in the works for a while, and they are in reality falling victim to the city-wide rent increases [via SFExaminer].

LOL Look at this weird old dude eating hipster ice cream

[via Humphry Slowcombe's twitter]

Today’s edition of Your Constantly Changing Neighborhood

First, Hoodline has the renderings of the condos that will replace Flax Art & Design. After years of their wooden guy trying to take down Travelodge, they finally lost the battle. The new condos will pay homage to San Francisco’s rich architectural history and – oh wait, it’s just another big boxy building.

[via Hoodline]

Next, Uptown Almanac reports that after thirteen years, Therapy’s furniture store on Valencia will close at the end of this month. The landlord increased their rent from $5,700 to $10,500, so, make of that what you will. It’s hard to remain shocked at this point.

[UPDATE: Image by Google Streetview inserted to clarify that the furniture store, on the left, is closing, while the clothing store is remaining open]

From UA:

In conversation, Whelan mentioned that he was never late on rent, and that there is simply “more demand for [Valencia Street] than there is Valencia.” Whelan believes that with the average “consumer on Valencia Street [being] a hyper-affluent tech person,” a Valencia Street store “becomes a billboard to promote [a company’s] brand.” The outrageous rent paid simply becomes another line item in a company’s marketing budget.

You know, like Times Square or something. Cool. Awesome. Love it. I’m sorry, I’m trying not to be so negative. But this neighborhood is being smothered by a huge pile of money. Speaking of money, you can save some by taking advantage of Therapy’s clearance sale!

Clothes Contact will in fact stay open through Burning Man *and* Halloween, at least

(Thanks, Capp Street Crap!)

Marc Maron is a Cancun guy

20140731-122054-44454613.jpg

Closed Contact

Looks like Clothes Contact is gonna peace out within 60 days:

$14000 / 2000ft² – Great Ground Floor on Valencia (mission district)

Great Frontage on Valencia and 16th. Nice three story building with great potential. Space will vacate approx 60 days… Possible to double space with full basement. Shown by appointment only.

Guess you gotta sell thrift by the ounce, not the pound, in this economy.

[via Craigslist]

Update: The gone-in-60-days figure may be inaccurate, according to current employee Travis:

Alright, I work there right now, and the truth is, it’s gonna be around at the very least until the end of the year. After that, we’ll have to wait and see what happens. But it’s sure as hell not closing in 60 days. Come in, you’ll see.

Calling our corner stores by name instead of calling them ‘the corner store’

I got tired of using intersections to specify what corner store you’re talking about: “The 20th and Bryant one is out of Watermelon Wheat, can you check the 23rd and Alabama one?” Etc., etc. So me and some friends started trying to call the ones we frequent by name, and we found that it’s both less time-consuming *and* more fun!

Here are all the ones I now know by name now:

  • Norm’s (20th and Bryant)
  • Mission Groceteria (23rd and Alabama)
  • Serv-U Market (21st and Bryant)
  • New Hampshire Market (20th and Hampshire)
  • King’s (22nd and Bryant)
  • Tony’s (24th and Hampshire)
  • Samy’s (24th and Bryant)
  • Isaac’s (22nd and Folsom)
  • R Image (25th and Folsom)
  • Rhea’s (19th and Valencia)

And then of course, there are these two:

What’d I miss?

[Photo by Google Maps]

The Dark Room is not closed, it’s just on hiatus

Dark Room boss Rhiannon fills us in:

The Dark Room has had another mishap, because when it rains, it pours, and this time it rained on a conduit box. So! We’re taking advantage of the usually underbooked July to take a short hiatus and do some repairs around the theater, make sure that everything’s all ship-shape, and while we’re at it, maybe I’ll actually get around to painting the ceiling like I’ve been threatening to do for like a year now.

In the meantime, because momentum is everything, we let The Business, Bad Movie Night, and all the rest of our recurring bookings know that we understand if they have to move to another venue. Because a 6-or-so-week hiatus can really hurt a show, but we need the time to get things back together. It would suck to lose them permanently, but at the same time, we can’t operate safely as-is.

How you, the world, can help:

  • Come see Twilight Zone: Live: A Parody Show! at The Exit Theatre, 156 Eddy at Taylor, Friday and Saturday nights at 8pm,
  • Support other local theaters who are putting on fantastic live performances and comedy,Throw money at The Dark Room’s paypal if you’d like (the donation link is at darkroomsf.com)
  • Take Dark Room volunteers out for a cocktail,
  • Enjoy your summer!

Get well soon, Dark Room!

Killer viral marketing for Dear Mom

[via Gawker]