Muff-diving gopher wants to sneak a peek at your bikini-clad grindquarters in Dolores Park

Doctor Dex explains:

Within seconds of these two bikini clad babes setting up at the park, this little muff diving gopher pops up out of nowhere.  Like seagulls at the beach moving in quick at the sight of a fallen cracker, these little fuckers are no different.  At first the sneaky fuck went unnoticed, until after inching closer and closer, to ridiculously close to get a better look.

Read on.

29 Responses to “Muff-diving gopher wants to sneak a peek at your bikini-clad grindquarters in Dolores Park”

  1. Squirt-guns loaded with vinegar and lemon juice. Mission accomplished!

  2. jon says:

    the guy is probably from a conservative/religious country where woman are clad head to toe. a little skin can drive a man wild….

    or, maybe he’s just a pervert

  3. Justin says:

    You were the perv taking the picture of the girls…

  4. hatertuesday says:

    what about wearing some pants at the park. it’s a fucking park not the beach.

    • Virginia says:

      Agreed… You can’t exactly call it “sneaking” a peek when the show is free.

    • Blake Schwarzenbach says:

      What about not creeping up to a girl’s crotch like a total asshole?

      Someone’s choice in what they wear is not consent to let others harass them. The blame for this type of crap ought to be put on the harasser, not the person being harassed. Victim blaming is lame.

      • victim blaming is indeed lame.

        btw, thorns of life week in sf two years ago ruled.

      • hatertuesday says:

        not blaming the victim at all. creeping is wrong. all kinds of wrong. creepers gon’ creep which is why i choose to wear pants to the park.

      • CC says:

        “Blake Schwarzenbach says:
        June 16, 2011 at 4:24 pm
        What about not creeping up to a girl’s crotch like a total asshole?

        Someone’s choice in what they wear is not consent to let others harass them. The blame for this type of crap ought to be put on the harasser, not the person being harassed. Victim blaming is lame.”

        YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY SPOT ON DUDE. FUCK ALL THESE ASSHOLES AND THEIR TWISTED AND PERVERSE THOUGHTS. SHAME ON THEM. THIS IS RAPE IS SO FUCKING PREVALENT IN THIS COUNTRY, BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE SUCH RELIGIOUS MORONS WHO ACTUALLY BELIEVE ALL THAT UTTER BULLSHIT AND NONSENSE IN THAT MAN-WRITTEN BOOK CALLED THE “BIBLE”, WHICH WAS NOT WRITTEN BY GOD OR ON BEHALF OF GOD. THE BIBLE IS NOTHING BUT A HISTORY BOOK FROM PEOPLE WHO WERE LIVING IN THE MIDDLE EAST AT THAT TIME. NO MORE, NO LESS. AND THE WAY PEOPLE TAKE IT FOR SOMETHING ELSE IS ABSOLUTELY NUTS, AND IT’S EVEN WORSE FOR ISLAMICS, AND ALL OTHER NUTTY RELIGIONS. ALL RELIGION IS ABOUT IS “CONTROL” AND “BRAINWASHING”.

        AND AS FAR AS THE COMMENT ABOUT IT BEING A “FUCKING” PARK AND NOT A BEACH, AND MAKING SOME VILE AND DISGUSTING REMARK AND INSINUATION THAT THIS WOMAN DOESN’T HAVE THE RIGHT TO WHERE WHAT SHE LIKES OR THAT SHE NEEDS TO COVER UP SOMETHING, IS TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY ABSURD AND FLAT OUT WRONG. THIS WOMAN HAS DONE NOTHING AT ALL WRONG, AND FOR THAT MATTER WHAT ABOUT ALL THE MEN WHO STRUT AROUND WITH NO CLOTHES ON EXCEPT FOR SHORTS. HOW IS THIS ANY DIFFERENT AT ALL??!!! ALL YOU PEOPLE ARE A BUNCH OF RELIGIOUS NUTS, ZEALOTS, COMMUNIST, UP-TIGHT CREEPS AND SCUMBAGS WHO FEAR STRONG WOMEN AND CAN’T STAND IT. YOU ARE PATHETIC HYPOCRITES AND SCUM FOR MAKING SUCH RETCHED REMARKS. MORE POWER TO THIS WOMAN, AND HOPEFULLY NEXT TIME SHE GOES TOPLESS!!!! SHE SHOULD HAVE EVERY MUCH AS RIGHT TO GO TOPLESS AS A MAN DOES, AND THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH IT AT ALL. IF PEOPLE HAVE A PROBLEM WITH IT, THEN DON’T LOOK. IT’S YOU WHO HAS THE PROBLEM WITH, YOU AND YOUR DIRTY, DISGUSTING, VILE, SICK, AND TWISTED THOUGHTS. I AM A WOMAN AND I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO PROBLEM WHATSOEVER SEEING ANYONE WALK AROUND ANYWHERE IN A BIKINI AND TOPLESS. EVEN BEING NAKED DOESN’T BOTHER ME A BIT. WE ARE ALL BORN NAKED AND THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH BEING NAKED AT ALL. WE WERE ONCE ALL NAKED. A LOT OF RELIGIOUS NUT CASES CAN’T STAND IT BECAUSE THEY ARE REALLY THREATENED BY IT AND CAN’T HANDLE IT. SAD, SAD, SAD TWISTED PEOPLE WITH LITTLE PEA BRAINS. IN EUROPE THEY ALL WALK AROUND ANYWHERE WITHOUT TOPS ON, BOTH MEN AND WOMEN, AND THAT IS BECAUSE THEY ARE GROWN UP ADULTS AND NOT CHILDREN LIKE THEY ARE HERE. GEEZ, PATHETIC PEOPLE AND THEIR SICK LITTLE MINDS WORKING OVERTIME.

    • thanks says:

      aww look at all the jealous girls with their body issues.

  5. jon says:

    maybe the guy is all motivated now to please his ugly wife. snorkel? check. mask? check. lights off? go!

  6. Herr Doktor Professor Deth Vegetable says:

    I spent a good 45 seconds looking at the picture trying to find an actual gopher. Duh.

  7. merw says:

    if the dude was cute, this wouldn’t even be an issue.

    • batman says:

      i agree, most ppl only want to be checked out by people they themselves find attractive. but in reality, more ppl that you dont find attractive check you out. its funny that way. as far as this situation goes.. well its kinda asking for it.. bud dood could have been more discrete.

      • GG says:

        Um, “checking out” is a far cry from “sneaking up and trying to invade your personal space and ogle your crotch without being noticed.”

  8. Think_for_me says:

    Should have worn camouflage: Flannel and a beard.

  9. Blake Schwarzenbach says:

    I’m not Blake, sadly. Just in a Jawbreaker mood and couldn’t think of any other pseudonym, sorry to disappoint!

  10. jon says:

    I figured it out:

    he’s just being ironic.

  11. The Problem with Larry says:

    I blame it all on Madonna. The original one. Though the new one hasn’t really helped stem the tide.

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