Mustache tips

Do:  When staying at a nice hotel, using some of that aromatherapy shampoo and conditioner on your mustache so you’ll be smelling sweet things all day.

Don’t:  When making a delicious warm pot of tom kha gai, accidentally spilling a little fish sauce into your mustache so that no matter how much you wash it, it will continue to smell like butts until you shave it off in reluctant desperation.

[Photo by Katie C]

Hipster rednecks

You know how people always make fun of rednecks living in the South who insist on keeping their broken down automobiles parked on their front lawn despite the fact that these vehicles have no hope of functioning ever again?

Well, in that case, a broken down scooter that’s been parked on the sidewalk in front of your shared flat in the Mission for so long that plants are growing through it definitely qualifies as the hipster equivalent.

Which means . . . I’m living down the street from hipster rednecks.