Just stick these suckers onto your guns and you’ll be tossing touchdowns and running into endzones like your favorite QB. A word to the wise: you might want to break out the body waxing strips before affixing these on!
Despite the rather inclement weather last Friday threatening to ruin New Year’s weekend, local artists Tim Hon and Steve Ha braved the elements to put some final touches on their 49ers tribute mural on the Walgreens at 23rd and Mission. Yesterday, their hard work was rewarded with a visit from Niners tight end Vernon Davis, still radiant after helping the team earn their first playoff berth in years, who stopped by to sign the piece and yuck it up with local media.
While not quite as astounding as Taqueria Vallarta’s “batshit insane” Niners mural, the fact that San Franciscans are interested in their football team again is a good thing for the city. Let’s just try not to riot again if they end up winning it all!
I always hit up Taqueria Vallarta after a show at Blue Six. The $1.50 taco bar is second to none. They fry up all the meats simultaneously in a loosely-partitioned circular grill that I affectionately call “Noah’s Ark”.
It’s a beautiful thing: you order with the man behind the grill, he loads up some tacos, you pay some tired guy wearing a change apron, and you pile on as much cilantro as you can handle. Hey La Taqueria: take note. $3.50 for a taco is ROBBERY.
Anyway, last time somebody told me to check out the mural while I was there. Ok, I thought, probably just another busty Aztec babe fetching a vase of water while a menacing conquistador stares on. Nope, try ill-proportioned 49ers playing football under the Golden Gate Bridge with the dolphins.
Then there’s more: the artist took it upon himself to write a rambling narrative about the parallel-universe origins of San Francisco and how bitchin’ the 49ers are. Did you know that they have the “excitement of the bear”?
Anyone know the story behind this masterpiece? Some borracho repaying his debt to the owner? Another coded message to members of the New World Order? Best explanation gets a taco on me. These are high stakes, folks.