Mission Mission

I saw this poster for the upcoming SF Vegan Bakesale and first thought, “Sweet!  I love cupcakes and the last vegan bakesale was fucking delicious!”  But then I really looked at the poster.  Vegans should be depicted as state-smashing, corporation-crushing, heart-breaking, chain smoking bike riders with an attitude so surly it is adorable.  So, what the fuck is this?  Vegans: if you want people to join your cause, do not pretend to be virginal middle schoolers whose most naughty action was sneaking an episode of “The Simpsons” while your parents were not looking.

Here, I made you a better poster:

Nothing says "our cause is awesome as shit" like an American flag bikini wearing, riffle-holding, hockey mom that will never win an election again but boys in Alabama love to masturbate to.

Chase Bank is feeding you Herbivore for free.  FREE FOOD.  Like Herbivore or not, at least it’s not a cult (although they could be).

(via vegansaurus!)

Now that Xanath has fallen, will the red tide of veganism put soy queso on every pizza at Pi Bar? (via vegansaurus!)

Previously on Mission Mission:

• “Vegans + Pi Bar = Outrage!“