Charlie Sheen Is On Fire

Charlie Sheen Is On Fire

I hung out a bit at Chris Daly’s new bar, Buck Tavern, on Market Street the other night. Anyway, enough about that. The TV was on so I got a little taste of what I left behind when I kissed cable news goodbye. Instead of maybe tracking the state of Egypt, a country that is literally on fire in places, they focused on some issue with Charlie Sheen and prostitutes, which actually seems like the opposite of “news”. Not because it’s not interesting, but because it’s neither new nor unexpected. In any case, I wondered what kind of message they were trying to send me by making up to 6 references to fire at one time. “BURNING”, “FIRE”, “BURNING”, “FIRED”, “BURNING” and actual footage of burning fire in the background.

Do they just use fire as a motif to make whatever they’re talking about seem interesting and urgent? Are they trying to suggest that he must be living with some intense Sexually Transmitted Infections? Or is the real story that Charlie Sheen is some kind of raging pyromaniac? Weird.