Mission Mission

You brake like a champ at the first hint of yellow? You don’t turn right on a red, even when it’s perfectly all clear? You drive a Subaru?

You are not worthy of your vanity plate.

Previously:

“Eat Your Kale” Vanity Plate

Remember this? I didn’t understand what it was at the time, but today I found out. A couple years back, artist Ledia Carroll plotted the former location of Mission Lake using this pleasant blue chalk. And a real field line chalker:

Now who wants to help me plot the former location of the 18th Street abattoir blood river using an unpleasant red chalk?

More chalk talk here: Restore Mission Lake Project. Thanks, LindyLula!

As the above trailer attests, a weekend of fun kicks off tonight at the Roxie:

The Disposable Film Festival was created in 2007 to celebrate the artistic potential of disposable video: short films made on non-professional devices such as one-time use video cameras, cell phones, point and shoot cameras, webcams, computer screen capture software, and other readily available video capture devices. With people everywhere posting videos online, we felt the time was right to draw attention to the creative potential of this new mode of filmmaking.

Event schedule here.

FYI, my favorite disposable films are maybe Snot Rocket! and Toll Plaza.

Inspired by Plinky, a prompt-centric new social network, local web celeb Mike Monteiro today explained how he’d spend $1000:

I’d head to the Marina with 50 $20 bills and set up in front of the fanciest liquor store I could find. I’d give every homeless dude a bill and make sure they told their friends to come get theirs as well. I’d double up on any of them that looked particularly wobbly.

I’d get my revenge for every calf-toned Marina hoochie who comes down to MY neighborhood every weekend to slum it up in the Mission and ends up throwing up on my doorstep at 3am because she can’t hold her liquor and Chad isn’t gracious enough to hold her hair back.

Link. OK, now shall we all join hands and rip on the Marina for a while?

Previously:

Marina Guy Rips on Mission Hipsters

Good Vibrations presents the fourth edition of its Independent Erotic Film Festival this August. They’re accepting entries now. My favorite part of the press release:

Filmmakers are encouraged to explore and present whatever they find erotic, regardless of the dictates of mainstream media.

So go forth and make a masterpiece, dictates be damned! Link.

Previously:

Erotic Film Shoot at the Knockout (NSFW)

Porny Passionistas Video

Over at 826 Valencia:

Our first food writing seminar, held in November, proved so popular that we wanted to have a second. This time our focus will be narrower, concentrating on the politics of food, its impact, and the science behind it. The conversation will range from discussing the themes addressed as well as how to turn thoughts, arguments and theories into palatable prose. In addition to reflecting on the writing process, the panelists will address issues related to the publishing aspects of food writing, such as contacting agents, working with publishing houses and newspaper editors, and running a successful blog.

The event takes place on February 25, 2009. Admission is $100. Reservations recommended.  Read all about the panelists here. [via Plebiscite]

Saw this dude on a dumpster somewhere between Coffee Bar and Pirate Cat last night. I like him.

I guess I’ve always known there were ponds and rivers and junk in the Mission back before I was born, but this week it came to my attention that maybe at least one of these rivers was lined with abattoirs and ran red with blood.

I asked Telstar Logistics‘  Todd Lappin if he could corroborate this, but the best he could do were these two maps. Commendable cartography both, but they corroborate no carnage. Anyone else have any hot leads?

We love David Cole‘s “pixely homage to the greatest bus line in SF, the 14.” Link, or click to enlarge.

And here’s a lovely accompaniment, also courtesy of Cole:

Man looks back at source of liquid creeping up bus floor. Someone else: “IT’S FUCKING BEER. STARING AT IT WON’T CHANGE THAT.” #14muni

Link.

Tonight at Galeria de la Raza, artist Ana Teresa Fernandez will be on hand to talk about her art with filmmaker Lourdes Portillo. Admission is free, fun starts at 7pm. ECDISIS, an exhibition of Fernandez’s work dedicated to the women of Juarez, runs through Saturday. Link.

I like this piece because it reminds me of when God gave me the finger.