Poop problem

Local renter David Enos experienced an utter bummer the other day:

Someone pooped through our front gate somehow, starting mid-way up, I guess it must have been accomplished with butt resting against the bars in a standing position.  How do you clean this up? We don’t have access to a hose, so I started by throwing a bucket of hot water on it from a few feet away.  A fine mist of water and feces hung in the air.  I went back out with some powdered Ajax and sprinkled it on the remaining mess.  The wind picked up and my throat burned with inhaled bleach.

Pretty awful, but… read on for the secondary problem.

Beware cops in the park making you dump out your hard-earned alcohol

They’re at it again, apparently. Here’s what SFist‘s Jay Barmann has to say about it:

It’s of course technically illegal to be drinking in the park. It’s illegal to be smoking cigarettes there too. Does everyone do both of these things on a daily basis? Yes. Do the cops even bother when the place is almost too thick with people even to walk through? Not usually. But clearly they were bored today, and looking to be spoilsports, or they got a call from an incorrigible, bitter, bored NIMBY who lives next to the park and has nothing better to do than be a killjoy on a sunny day.

People like that deserve our pity.

But just a warning to be on alert these days with your bottles. Keep them well concealed or you might lose half a bottle of lovely Pinot Gris. [link]

[Photo by Devon Chulick]

The safest bicycle parking spot in the whole city

Right on the illustrious corner of 6th and Mission.  What do you think, guys?  Is it still there?

What if the Roxie’s miniature human robot was stolen, along with two beignet?

Wait, what? Oh… I just love Natalie‘s dream:

Had this dream in which Mike Keegan built a miniature human robot, but the Roxie was broken into and the robot was stolen, along with one chocolate and one plain beignet.

Whaaaaaaaat! I want this to be a feature-length motion picture! (There’s more, but that was the meat of it.)

[Photo via the Roxie on Facebook]

Thieves hijack Sean Lennon’s beats near Franklin and Hayes

From Mr. Lennon’s ‘gram:

Our percussionist Connor Grant’s laptop was stolen today in San Francisco! Our van window was smashed this morning as he was getting coffee near Franklin and Hayes. BIG REWARD if computer is returned unharmed! NO QUESTIONS ASKED! If anyone knows anything pleeeeease contact us at mutethehead@gmail.com

My dad’s car got burgled on that exact same block a couple months back. I guess, never park on that block!

[via Sarah Lane]

First they steal your bike, then they assault you and pepper spray you

Got a note from our pal Jocelyn:

My bike was stolen (not news, not unique, I know). The real story is when I saw two guys with it on Market/12th. I went up to them, looked at the bike and one of them said “Nice bike, huh?” And I was like, “yeah, it’s mine.”

I picked it up, and started walking away with it. The guys chased me. One knocked me to the ground grabbing the bike, the other fucking pepper sprayed me in the face. EMTs and SFPD (eventually) showed up.

The only bright side to the story is that (hopefully) the police are taking it more seriously because of the felony assault. So, if someone spotted the bike they could contact me or SFPD.

Wow.

Here’s the bike (since this photo was taken the saddle was replaced and is now brown):

3D photograph of a tipped Smart Car

See the SFist report “Local Pranksters Are Flipping Smart Cars for Kicks” for the story.

See Doc Pop‘s weekly Mission Mission column “3D City” for more 3D fun.

[via Doc Pop's non-blog]

Shrimp Boy has a posse

[via Stray Snake]

Crooked cops in the Mission!

The newly independent Mission Local reports:

A federal grand jury in San Francisco  indicted two police officers and a former police officer who were assigned to the Mission Station with “conspiracies to distribute controlled substances, against civil rights, and to commit theft concerning federally-funded programs,” according to a press release issued Thursday from from the U.S. Attorney’s office.

One officer was also charged with extortion.

[...]

The Mission Station defendants include Sergeant Ian Furminger, 47, of Pleasant Hill, Officer Edmond Robles, 46, of Danville and Reynaldo Vargas, 45, of Palm Desert, California.

The defendants were issued a federal summons and will make their initial appearances tomorrow at 9:30 a.m. before the US Court Judge Elizabeth D. Laporte in federal court in San Francisco.

Defendant Vargas will appear before Judge Laporte at 2:00 p.m. today.

Read on.

[File photo by Chris Bunting]

This BMW that parks in front of my house on street cleaning days and doesn’t mind the tickets

Multiple weeks in a row now. I mean, it must be fun to not care about parking tickets, but the other consequence is my gutter doesn’t get swept :(