Mission Mission

Mission Mission reader tack responded to the release of Google Maps Walking Directions with the following observation:

You can walk from Dolores Park to Williamsburg, Brooklyn:

[link to walking directions]

But to stay awake for 43 days of non-stop walking you’ll probably lose yourself to meth before you get there. And your low-rise girl jeans won’t fit no more.

Zing! Thanks, tack.

[BTW, we know this was in our comments section, but we didn't realize how good an item it was until we saw it reposted on The Point Is The General Point.]

Previously on Mission Mission:

Google Maps Walking Directions Lets You Plan Route Through Dolores Park

Behold the Prize-Winning (I Lost Me to) Meth Story

Look what I ran into during my lunch break in downtown San Jose.

Previously on Mission Mission:

Affordable Engagement Rings For Sale in La Taqueria Gumball Machines

Muni Overhead Wire Technicians Allowed To Double Park Outside La Taqueria

This is an ad for the San Francisco Parks Trust.

Previously on Mission Mission:

Ad Watch: Meth, Zionism, Oil Addiction and Kitty Cats

Yesterday, in my summer intensive, I met Erin, the Special Event Director for the 48 Hour Film Project. We bonded over living/working in the Mission.

The 48 Hour Film Project is where a team of people are required to make a movie in 48 hours based on a given line, prop, and character. The films that are being shown this week were made locally and submitted on Sunday night. Here was the info given to the various teams:

Character: Gus or Gloria Lorenz, Trade Expert

Prop: A ticket for a bus, plane, or train

Line of Dialogue: ” Forget it, I already have.”

The remaining films are being shown at the Roxie tonight and Monday with showtimes at 7:00 and 9:30pm.

We’re going to the 9:30 show tonight, and I heard that if you present your ticket at Dalva, you get $1 off drinks before and after the event. The whole thing sounds fun!

Has anybody seen it in a different mood? Anybody know its name? Seen at 26th and Mission.

If you see a homeless person passed out on the street, call the Mobile Access Assistant Patrol Service (MAPS MAP) at (415) 431-7400. Okay, checks out. But like what if the person is passed out because they’re diabetic or epileptic or got bludgeoned? Homeless people can need medical attention too.

Photo by seanbonner. [via Metblogs]

The Hamburger Eyes blog today detailed the advantages of enrolling in the Photo Epicenter Tutorial Program:

Photo Epicenter provides the ultimate darkroom printing experience. The black and white darkroom is a private room with professionally maintained equipment and materials and is readily available for all your printing needs. The color darkroom is one of the best in the country, the ultimate workspace and one of the only of it’s kind with natural light to assess print quality. The color darkroom is also professionally maintained and calibrated so you know you’re getting the most out of your photos. These tutorials come in packages of two sessions for either color or black and white.

Link. Packages cost $200, but include tons of dark room time and first-hand wisdom from pros like Hamburger Eyes guru Ray Potes, so sign up while you still can.

Photo by photoepicenter.

Holla Back SF today shares Karen’s tale of this perv who accosted her and a friend on the street near 16th and Mission:

We told him to fuck off and he just kept laughing and saying stuff that we couldn’t understand, but that was obviously sexual. We slowed way down because we didn’t want him behind us anymore and he promptly dropped his pants halfway down his thighs while still chuckling so we had to stare at his nasty ass for the rest of the block.

Link to full story.

Over at Nuño Meat Market, El Güero relays a fun afternoon spent at the 22nd and Valencia Social Security Office:

Yesterday, my wife and I were at the Social Security Office on 22nd and Valencia getting replacement cards. While waiting, there was an Asian woman (Chinese, I think) working there who was calling off numbers for service tickets, similar to the system they now have at the DMV. She was calling off “B393…B393..”. This old Mexican guy sitting next to me, shows me his ticket that’s marked with D393 and asks me,”Did she say B or D?”. I said I didn’t know but that he should go up there anyway since no one else is. So he saunters up to the window and she took care of him. After that, she starts calling out “B”396….B as in David!” Am I going crazy?

Link. And that’s just the beginning!

(Note: Try to have Instant Rimshot handy while reading [via Big Contrarian].)

Everywhere Magazine is our favorite user-generated travel periodical, and the centerpiece of a forthcoming issue will be a feature on San Francisco. From the official call for submissions:

The package will be a collection of articles, photos, and tips about how to enjoy San Francisco like the locals do. What neighborhoods, stores, restaurants, bars, or events do you put on your must-see list? The quirky, the offbeat, and the unexpected are most welcome. SF’s best places to hide on a foggy day? A visitor’s guide to understanding Frank Chu? The battle of the best burritos? The city’s most under-explored neighborhoods?

Link. Deadline is August 28. And remember, this is a quality magazine, and we’re pretty sure its readership is quality too, so don’t try to bamboozle them with some b.s. about Medjool being your favorite local watering hole or La Cumbre still being good.