Mission Mission

Jane knows the answer:

Former Mission resident Mike Monteiro, widely recognized as one of the top two funniest people on Twitter, got at least semi-serious last month for a piece he did for the Brooklyn Museum.

He took over one of their Twitter feeds for all of June, and turned it into a gripping work of art. Here’s a small excerpt:

Do read the whole thing. I almost cried.

Previously:

Mike Monteiro on Fat San Franciscans in the Summertime

Mike Monteiro on Marina Hoochies Invading the Mission

Happy Friday, my fellow Americans! What better way to celebrate our nation’s independence than by adopting one of the below cutie pies!?

Shortstop — 2 year old terrier mix

This guy! Such a cute and adorable little guy….can’t you just picture yourself strolling the streets of San Francisco, stopping for a burrito, and enjoying Dolores Park together? Shortstop is a bright and active dog, hoping to find a home with adopters who’ll be able provide him with plenty of opportunities for both mental and physical exercise on a daily basis. Attending training classes will be a great way for him to learn the skills needed to become a well mannered companion.

Sassy (aka Ms. America) — 9 year old female shorthair

Sassy wants you! To adopt her! What a delightful kitty Sassy is! She is friendly, outgoing, and playful and enjoys petting, affection and lap time. She may even roll over and let you pet her belly! She’s a darling lady, eager to nuzzle your face and purr in your ear and be your one and only cat princess!

All pets adopted from SFSPCA have received a pre-adoption veterinary exam and behavior assessment, vaccinations, spay/neuter surgery and a microchip.

Where: The San Francisco SPCA’s Maddie’s Adoption Center
Address: 250 Florida Street (at 16th – Street)
Hours: Open Tues – Friday 1 p.m. to 7 p.m., and Saturday/Sunday 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. (Closed Mondays and major holidays.
Contact: 415-522-3500, www.sfspca.org
Follow SFSPCA at facebook.com/sfspca and twitter.com/sfspca.

SEASONAL NOTE:

Our Cat-A-Palooza summer adoption bonanza continues through July, with our famous ‘Name your own adoption fee’ for any kitteh 6 months and older – wowzers!

P.S. – We like to celebrate too, so both our adoption center and hospital will be closed to the public on Sunday, July 4th.

We’ve gone round and round about the issue of a human body parking in a spot for a car (and it seems the debate has finally ended . . . ?) but what about a car parking squarely in an intersection, yet just along the outside of a human walking area that is not a sidewalk?

Do we have a problem here? It seems to me that a car is parked in the middle of the street.

More bike lane desecration! Well if a government institution does it, I guess that makes it ok. This feat is particularly impressive given the difficulty around getting past those mailboxes.

Well, at least he’s not blocking the whole lane like the last guy. Must be a cyclist when he’s off duty.

Previously:

Freshly Painted Green Bike Lanes on Market Apparently Not Quite Enough

Previously:

Cute Sheep in Dolores Park (VIDEO)

Cute BABY Sheep in Dolores Park

Photo by eb78.

Hey, nerd girls, lay off the GPOYWs for a minute and look at this: The producers of The Dog Whisperer are currently casting a new show called Nerd Girls, and you should probably try to get in on the action. Eye on Blogs will tell you how to get involved right here.

Best of luck, nerd girls!

First GPOYW by Bailey; second GPOYW by Gina.

My favorite soju-slingin’ bar Amnesia has been redecorating, and it looks like they are going for a nautical theme. They are soliciting donations for items such as:

-Old Steamer Trunks (antique big leather and metal kind)
-Large docking rope
-Lamps, lanterns with nautical appeal
-Ship wheels
-portholes (round frames or windows)
-Chandeliers (send a picture first!)
-old, thin barn wood
-Any wooden barrels of any size
-wooden ship figure heads
-old model ships
-old ships in bottles
-taxidermy of the nautical variety… fish, sea birds, etc
-any other sort of old-timey nautical nonsense that seems appropriate for our cozy chamber.

This seems like a somewhat odd request from a place that’s across the street from a goddamned pirate store, but who am I to judge. Contact them amnesiasf (at) gmail.com if you’ve got the goods.

(via Mission Locatl)

The construction crews have finished re-paving the street and have commenced painting the new boundaries for vehicles, bicycles, and pedestrians.  At first glance, it might look a lot like the old Valencia.  However, the discerning viewer can appreciate the myriad improvements here. 

First of all, that wide, unnecessary, center-dividing “parking lot” has been eliminated in favor a simple, sensible yellow line that widens only at intersections to allow for left turns.  Sorry bros, no more parking in the center divider just so you can pop into Puerto Alegre for a quick marg.  Gonna have to stick with the party bus from now on.

As a result, this creates significantly more space for vehicles in the middle of the road, which consequently allows the bicycle lanes to not only be wider but also further away from the rogue suddenly-swinging-open parked car doors that have a nasty habit of clotheslining unsuspecting cyclists. 

Vehicles still have enough space to park (as before), while pedestrians also manage to come out ahead since they get a few extra feet of sidewalk space.  So if I see you and 4 of your friends all walking towards me on the sidewalk in a horizontal line so you can all pleasantly chat together, I’ll still think you’re an asshole, but at least I’ll be able to get by you.

So, what’s the final equation, Prof? 

[Valencia] – [center divider] = [more fucking space for everybody]

Of course, I’m all for the “greening” of San Francisco, but I think the city planners might have taken things a little too far in this case . . .

Previously:

Coming Soon: Valencia Streetscape Improvements

Valencia Doing Work

Getting A Feel For The New Valencia

Dude seriously, if you go all out on the Fourth, AAA will tow you home for free, member or not. Take advantage! Johnny Funcheap has all the particulars.

RAZRvision masterpiece by mrak75.