Mission Mission

Boy do I love this guy. You can catch him operating out of a truck on 22nd and Bartlett by Revolution Cafe. The only distinguishing markings on his truck are “Lucero Produce, Daly City”. I don’t know if this is Mr. Lucero himself, but let’s just call him Señor Coco:

Order a coconut for 3 bucks, and he expertly opens it for you with 2 carefully placed chops of the cleaver. He doesn’t seem to mind high-velocity coconut debris flying out in every direction, so I suppose you shouldn’t either. He sticks a straw in and there you go, the freshest and best-tasting coconut juice around. This is quite a contrast to the pleasant young folks at Bi-Rite who will do the same, but based on the time it takes they are probably scratching their heads in the back room for a while looking up “how to open a coconut” Youtube videos on their smartphones.

Here’s the real edge: when you’re done drinking the juice, bring it back. He’ll crack it open, scrape out the pulp, and serve it mixed with chili powder, lemon juice, and salt in a ziplock bag. If you’re in a hurry and want to take everything to go, he’ll dump the juice in another ziplock bag and chop it up for you in one session. His regulars seem hip to this, since the wait can get long.

The first time I visited Señor Coco, he spoke to me completely in Spanish, but not in a “I’m not gonna speak English for you, yuppie scum” kind of way. It was more like a “you seem like a pretty smart guy who might know some Spanish” kind of way. It’s sorta true. I studied Spanish for 4 years in high-school.  This means I just suck at Spanish as opposed to not knowing Spanish at all. I cobbled together some phrase that demonstrated I knew the subjunctive tense and he laughed. This dude is always in an awesome mood.

I asked if he’s here every Saturday and Sunday and he says “yes, señor, I’ll be here waiting for you!” Couldn’t tell if he’s just bullshitting with me about his availability, but I’ll definitely be checking again next weekend.

(Thanks, Shannon!)

Pretty!

(Thanks, Shannon!) (Bon voyage, Tegan!)

Thanks, Erin and Jack!

UPDATE: Facebook rectified the situation within a little over a day of my posting this, and wrote in to tell me so. Thanks, Facebook!

That’s what the class was called, man! “IR 361: Terrorism and Covert Political Warfare.” It was popular and well attended. And Facebook wants to DENY ITS EXISTENCE.

Anyway here’s what I went with:

Because I’m a hacker.

Just for goodness’ sake try not to spill any meat grease on it.

Reader Melanie delivers the good news in the comments section of a previous post about pierogi parties:

Pierogies can now be found in the mission!!! Giordano Bros (16th and mission) has three varieties: cheese onin, swweet potato and serrano and jack cheese. yummy yummy in my tummy. check it out!

Yay!

Hidden Paradise Cafe has been operating from within Mission Market for at least several months now, but I’m pretty sure this “BAR & GRILL” business is brand new. Can’t wait to see what’s inside!

(Thanks to reader Chris T. for the pic.)

All this talk about the best burrito in the city seems to have whet the appetite of more than a few folks, including our pal Emily who had some friends visiting and used the opportunity to engage in a blind burrito taste test to systematically decide on the best vegetarian burrito in the Mission (because we all know the best vegetarian burrito in the city has already been crowned).  Sounds like a rad way to spend a sunny day in the park!  Check out the results (including a winner with which we’re quite comfortable) and astute methodology here.

And if you ever happen to get tired of the Mission (I know, blasphemy), Emily’s blog, Butter Date, offers another nice look into hanging out in Oakland should you ever feel the need to traverse across the bay.  Go forth and conquer!