Mission Mission

Beware! Thanks, Katie D.! (Click to enlarge.)

Previously:

Urban Safari Impedes Flow of Traffic

Beware. Thanks, Victor H.!

Drew Hoolhorst, my new favorite San Francisco blogger, spent yesterday afternoon in Dolores Park:

I was hanging out this afternoon in Dolores Park and a few things dawned on me:

1. Dolores Park is essentially the crowd for a Phish show that has no idea that Phish is not coming. And that they are not at a concert venue. And that it is, in fact, not legal to do drugs in downtown San Francisco. This is also why Dolores Park is mesmerizing and is also basically one big car accident that you cannot stop staring at. I was offered today (in no particular order) weed truffles, a banana cream pie, a small ukulele, a hula hoop lesson, a thick leather bracelet that went out of style in “always”, cold beer, water (ha! just kidding), and finally (my favorite): a couple’s demanding that we all watch them make out. Quick note about the couple. Hey guys, either start taking off some clothes or go home. Otherwise, all I’m getting is skinemax, and every time I try to fast forward it’s just the part where you have all your clothes on and give each other eskimo kisses. Wait, you’ve never seen that in a porn? Weird! Neither have I! This porn sucks.
2. Swingsets and many other childhood games/playground items are essentially like putting your kid in a taxi cab in downtown Cairo with no seatbelt on, and then leaving them in the car while you light firecrackers and chuck them in the window while laughing. (No, I have never been to Cairo, but that’s just me assuming it’s dangerous while also possibly skewing towards “accidentally racist”)  (Link)

Other great entries:

• “Don’t Pass This Apartment Up!“
• “Splenda: The Redheaded Stepchild of Delicious“
• “Are you my ex-girlfriend? Call me!“

He also has a pretty amazing twitter stream.

Really?

(Thanks Eric! – Found on 18th between Treat and Folsom)

Lisa from everydayphotos shares some tragic news:

I was pretty bummed to see A Sunday Afternoon at Dolores Park get defaced already. I’ve watched the mural on 19th and Guerrero be painted over several months and it was finally just completed, so it’s too bad that someone couldn’t just graffiti somewhere else.

Additionally, Musk, whose body of work I’ve generally appreciated, ate a big bowl of pasta covered in lamesauce over the past few days and tagged a bunch of residential buildings and houses in the Mission.  Sorry Musk, but you’ve been degraded from “street artist” to “15-year-old boy with mommy issues.”

From 10-5, the police did not seem interested in doing anything more dramatic than giving homeless people a hard time, but I noticed the typical drug-bizarre was missing from Hipster Hill.  Did they ever come out and taze some bros?

Found at 23rd and SVN.

I was stoked to see more non-hallucinogenic pastries being sold in Dolores Park this weekend but was shocked to discover that it wasn’t being done illegally.  Permits?  What?  You mean I’m paying tax n’ shit for cupcakes?  My world is crushed.

But seriously, the cupcake I had was incredibly delicious.  And, most importantly, the truck has spinning-hubcaps, which pretty much makes it the most awesome thing this side of Twin Peaks.

Website

Twitter

In other news, I discovered that attempting to drink the bartender under the table is amateur vs. professional.

Yesterday, someone got a free undercarriage wash upgrade at the 25th and Folsom car wash.

In other news, the guy getting out of the car looks really disappointed. (youtube)

Thanks Amit!