Mission Mission

Tumblr user stupidexcited (not pictured) shares a fascinating problem:

I’ve observed a local phenomenon and am wondering if anyone empathizes: 2/3 times you order a super chicken quesadilla at Cancun, there will be crispy wonderful chunks of bacon goodness in there. Just, little bacon crunchies that you didn’t ask for but somehow appeared in a miracle of animal cross-pollination. BUT 1/3 times, it’s just a chicken quesadilla with a side of disappointment. If you specifically ask for bacon on your quesadilla the guys behind the counter will act flustered, feign confusion, and sometimes outright deny the existence of bacon in one or even two languages. !?!??! whyyy? why introduce me to the bacon-dilla in the first place if you’re just going to toy with my heart’s stomach like this? [link]

Troublesome! What’s the deal?

[Photo by C.R.E.A.M.]

Laura from Ragabond tells us about her business:

We are an upcycled, vintage, and handmade clothing company with a showroom in the mission district. We are indie, small business, environmentally friendly and in the mission! We open our showroom to the public on the First Friday Art Walk in the mission from 630-930, offer shop by appointment, as well as sell in our etsy store.

Browse their online selection here. To win a $50 gift certificate, tell us in the comments section below about your best vintage find ever. Winner will be chosen based on merit. Contest ends at noon next Wednesday.

Here’s the showroom:

But seriously, who actually goes to the chiropractor? Let these sham doctors crack your back once and it’ll feel good for a week, but then it’ll act up again and you’ll just have to keep going back. And back. FOREVER.

Disclaimer: I’ve never been to see a chiropractor.

Local humorist Jon Skulski just published a fucking trippy-ass piece of Frasier fanfic:

Fraiser 3000 is a futuristic reimagination of the popular Cheers spinoff, Fraiser.

Set in the distant year 33,000, Fraiser finds himself in a bleak dystopian future ravaged by war, disease and terminator robots.

Tired of mistreatment and abuse, the robots have turned the tables on their masters, the humans. Self-organizing at an incredible rate, the terminators have driven humanity to festering cities, deep underground. Who can help those that  long for the sun and choke on the fetid air?

Humanity’s last hope: Dr. Fraiser Crane!

Read on, please.

P.S. In all seriousness, seriously, the Frasier finale was fucking good. I hadn’t watched the show in years, but I happened to tune into the final few minutes of the series because it aired right before something else I wanted to watch, and it slayed me. Give it a try.

Hey guys, don’t forget to go to Uptown Almanac‘s locally-sourced stand-up comedy show tonight. It’s all local comics! Sure, these folks might not be interviewed on WTF in the near future, but they will probably tell more jokes that are specific to your San Franciscan sensibilities, like “what is the deal with gum on the sidewalk” and “why are people in their mid-to-late 30′s in love with Sutro tower?” Plus, bragging rights. In 10 years you can say you saw them all before they had failed sitcoms.

It’s only $7 at the door and if you’re not ready to laugh the cover includes enough free PBR to make anyone funny.

Edit: It wasn’t my intention to trash these comics or Uptown Almanac, if that’s what came across. I was making some probably poor-taste jokes about careers in stand up comedy in general (too much listening to Mark Maron). I sincerely apologize if this was taken that way. We have supported these comics and this event before and think they are great. I will be there. Needless to say, I will not be performing comedy.

Last year’s hipster to-do list was one of our most popular posts ever, so finding a good sequel has been high on our to-do list ever since. This one might be a winner:

I mean, it’s strong right off the bat with the ukelele thing, and the gym thing and “motorcycle ok” are just killer, but it’s the SXSW that really just slays me.

And if you’re not already following The Fog Bender religiously, get on it.

Brick & Mortar is fast becoming my preferred music hall. It’s so close to home, AND they’re hosting a lot of killer lineups! Give a quick listen to the new album by Cosmonauts, which is kind of surfy and kind of Velvet Undergroundy:

To buy tickets and read more about all the bands, see here.

To win tickets, tell us your best fuzz-related anecdote in the comments section below. Winner will be chosen based on merit and awarded a pair of tickets. Contest ends Thursday at noon.

Q: How do you find Will Smith in the snow? A: Fresh Prince (thanks, Dolores Park port-a-potty graffiti!)

— Helen Tseng (@birdmeat) June 10, 2012

LOL!

Is what I’m most looking forward to on tonight’s menu from sous beurre kitchen, which is popping up at Dear Mom every Monday night in June:

Heirloom cauliflower gratin with farmstead cheese something something, grilled broccolini and something!?! Fuck yeah! Starts at 5:00!