Mission Mission

The San Francisco Mime Troupe is performing for FREE in Dolores Park tomorrow, Monday 9/6. The show starts at 1:30pm.

They are called the “Mime Troupe” but don’t expect to see skinny dudes in whiteface pulling imaginary ropes. Do expect to see a hilarious musical theater production with a typical pinko SF spin on a current political theme.

This year’s production is called: “Posibilidad, Or Death of the Worker”. Here’s the trailer:

[photo by Steve Rhodes]

Doctor Popular reminds us how bicyclists often get shafted on BART:

Yesterday a rider cut in front of me as I was boarding the train and she took up this whole seat. There were at least 40 other seats open for her, so I asked if she would mind letting me use that space. “I was here first” she replied. Then I asked if she would at least move her bags so I could sit in the seat next to her while I propped my bike against the wall and she said “I need the whole seat”.

All this seems to come from a general sense of passenger animosity towards people who have the nerve to bring their bikes on board. I’ve had some seriously unsafe rides due to folks not offering up those spots. In a way, it forces you to take up more space and disturb even more passengers.

Doc Pop commenter Colin brings up a great point about how the whole process is flawed:

Note that even in that space the bike wheel sticks into the doorway. Bikes on BART is a kludge.

Newer cars have improved designated bike areas, but they are few and far between. The SF Bicycle Coalition confirms that they are working to address the issue:

We are asking BART to allocate space on board their trains for bikes so that they won’t interfere with other passengers and can be stowed safely for the duration of your trip. BART plans to remove seats on 80 of its 500 train cars for a first phase and is expected to modify the rest as funding becomes available.

For many, the commute hours rules (bikes only allowed 8:50am-4:25pm) eliminate the practicality of biking for many daily work commuters. A 2009 SFBC survey of BART riding cyclists confirmed that the commute blackout period is one of the biggest headaches about commuting. No word on if or when lifting this restriction will ever be considered.

Sick of hearing about Dolores Park yet?

Last night, Parks and Rec approved a 2-year lease allowing Blue Bottle Coffee to post up in Dolores Park, meaning we’re going to start seeing some long lines for something other than the bathrooms. The cart will operate from 8am-4pm.

Local businesses, such as (shocker!) Dolores Park Cafe, aren’t too crazy about this development and are hoping to prevent the kiosk from being located in “the heart of” the park. Hey, don’t worry guys: I’m sure a steady amount of sales come from folks wanting to use your customers-only restroom. Or maybe it’s time to protest the park bathroom renovations too?

In other related news: do you think the park “jumped the proverbial shark,” as Brock puts it?

[via the Examiner, photo by Lauren Hoernlein]

Not in the Mission, but you’ll probably recognize Stanley Donwood’s artwork from the covers of Radiohead albums (which I’m sure you’ve got taking up bytes there on your Zune or Creative Labs Zen).

When thinking of iconic imagery in music from the last 20 years, Stanley Donwood’s work with Radiohead invariably comes to mind – and for good reason.  Where Radiohead’s music stretched the auditory horizons and painted musical sceneries of mans place in the modern world, Donwood’s imagery and packaging forced us to face the gravity of the music from the minute the album hit our hands; and by creating cryptic, academic and (at times) dystopian layouts, the albums themselves became as striking and relevant as the music they contained.

His show, entitled  ”Over Normal”, opens tonight, Thursday September 2nd, from 7:30-10pm at Fifty24SF gallery on 218 Fillmore St. I’m sure he wants to tell you all about what Thom Yorke is like and would gladly deliver your demo tape.

Flyer here. More info over at fify24sf.

Woah woah woah… having a show on 9/11? Isn’t it too soon? Intergalactic dance band Planet Booty has the answer:

FYI I will continue posting Planet Booty’s shows as long as they keep making these amazing promotional videos.

Previously:

Planet Booty This Friday @ the Blue Macaw

The Dolores Park Community Meeting at Mission High School wrapped up at 8pm Wednesday. There were a lot of strong opinions, but the meeting stayed civil. We focused on two main topics:

Traffic Safety on 19th and Dolores

Neighbors and park-goers agree that 19th and Dolores is a dangerous intersection. With the unlikely combination of dog walkers, children, and intoxicated you-know-what-sters it’s a miracle that the street doesn’t get a splattered with a daily red paint job.

Manito Velasco of the SFMTA did most of the talking and plainly stated that no new stop signs will be installed. They have have studied the traffic flow on weekdays and don’t think it meets federal guidelines for signs. One guy said that they should study the traffic on weekends because, like doye, it’s totally different. Zing. Velsaco said he’d do that. Also, nuh-uh to traffic lights, ’cause those sons of bitches cost $350,000.

What they do propose is some combination of the following:

• High visibility and way-fun “zebra striped” crosswalks (you know, for kids)
• Yield notifications
• Pedestrian Xing stencils
• 20th and Dolores traffic light timing tweaks

They are also looking into:

• Disallowing U-Turns (To which one neighbor replied to the effect of, “But then I can’t go home without doing a lap around San Francisco first!” Somebody get this lady google maps STAT.)
• Remove some parking spaces on the corners to increase visibility
• Reduce the San Jose 280 offramp to one lane to discourage people from taking shortcuts through the Mission

After some prodding from the audience, Velasco conceded that they are “not opposed” to stop signs but want to check out other options first. Oh ok, so “no stop signs” is now “maybe stop signs”.

Sorry what were we just talking about again? I got distracted looking out the window at the people in Dolores Park having an awesome time in the 70 degree weather. Oh yeah, traffic on 19th and Dolores.

Two diagrams for the redesigned intersections were shown, featuring neat “bulb outs” and “pedestrian refuges”. A guy pointed out that the diagram showed a clip-art car making a dangerous U-turn, or a sorry excuse for a left turn. Someone fire that illustrator.

Enforcement of Park Rules

Supervisor Bevan Duffy gave a long rambling introduction for the Mission Police Station’s Captain Corrales in which he called the dude a total hard ass, but damn it all, he respects him. Corrales, who would really rather have been at the Giants game, reminded us that drinking and smoking have always been illegal in Dolores Park. That being said, if there are no complaints, they don’t go out and bust people. He added that after the park stabbing in early August neighbors got spooked and increased complaints about drinking, smoking, and other fun stuff in the park so they sent those motorized robocops around to issue citations. How many? 28, to be exact. 19 for drinking, 9 for smoking. He then rolled his eyes about emails whining that the sight of patrolling police cars was “ruining the ambiance” of the park. This guy is pretty snarky! I like it. He should write a blog.

On to the comments which, like on a Mission hyper-local blog, is where things get a little tense.

This guy whose name rhymes with “Tevin Tontgomery” said that SF has a history of not enforcing laws and that the city often pioneers the legislative destruction of outdated laws. He added that cops should be busting killers and stuff, and not jerking around fun-loving 20-somethings which is “ageism”. Corrales shrugged and said, “speak for yourself, dude. I have been enforcing the law for 40 years”. Wow! That guy is cucumber boy, as in “cool as a”. Bevan Duffy got HELLA PISSED and said some stuff about how immigrants are protected by law and that he visits crime victims in hospitals, which was sorta confusing, but got some woo-hoos and applause.

A Latin-American 20-year resident of 19th and Dolores who kinda looks like John Tuturro brought up how young brown kids growing up in the ‘hood see cops turning a blind eye to the whiteys in the park partying down, while busting them for the same stuff, leading to the perception that cops and hipsters are full of shit. Touché, sir. No one’s touching that one.

Neighbors holding babies chimed in. They’re not “anti-fun”, just anti-people barfing on their doorsteps, dancing on their cars, stealing their cell phones, leaving trash everywhere, and having loud non-permit raves (Fun facts: only 2 permits are issued for Dolores Park events a month, and none of them allow events after 6pm). One reminisced about the old days where the young people would chillax with one discreet bottle in hand, as opposed to wheeling in kegs and smoking the doobies everywhere. They also zinged the cops for the handling of the nighttime crowd dispersal last week, which involved bullhorns and bright lights. Cops said they would try to do better.

Later that night, the cops dispersed the crowds in the park with bullhorns and  bright lights from a menacing cruiser. Not that I was, um, there or anything.

One park-goer commented on how she drinks in the park (Oops! Hear that Captain Corrales?) but totally respects the space, sympathizes with the neighbors, and cleans up after herself. Yessir, it’s probably those ruffians with the arm tattoos that are just ruining it for everyone. Neighbors nodded in approval as if to say, “you’re one of the good ones, babe.”

Then there was some more chatter about the trash can and bathroom situation. In short, the renovation will address all these things. For now, port-o-johns on somewhat arbitrarily selected days will have to do. As for trash? No word, but you’d be surprised how much of it you can stuff in a medium Timbuk2 messenger bag.

Wrap-up

I haven’t been to a lot of these sorts of meetings, so I’m not sure what to make of the outcome. Crystal Vann Wallstrom of Dolores Park Works was optimistic about everyone coming to agreement which didn’t happen. In the end, she shrugged and said, “we’ll keep doing this every year until we all agree”. No hurry, folks. On the other hand, it was a chance for people to be heard by parties on all sides, which must be positive.

In all seriousness, thanks for Dolores Park Works for setting up the meeting. It was a good experience to hear all sides of the argument in a controlled fashion. Organizing and moderating these meetings seems exhausting, and it’s not a task I’d be up for. I hope you all make it to the next one.

Somebody erected this fertility monument on Shotwell and 19th. Note how when the sun is at it’s peak elevation in the summer sky, the shadow cast by this masterpiece forms a perfectly-rendered ball sack.

This may be the most important dong discovery since the Cerne Abbas Giant.

[Photo and title Jeff D., Spots Unknown]

Hey check it out, Local Mission Eatery on 24th thinks it’s just swell that you didn’t go to Burning Man this year and wants to buy you a beer.

I guess technically every deal in town this week could be perceived as an “anti-burning man” deal. I think I’m ok with that considering everything for the last 3 months was billed as a “get ready for burning man special!”

In that spirit: here are some other awesome “Thank You For Not Going To Burning Man” deals this week:

• The Exploratorium’s “Steampunk Is Not Real Science” free admission today (Wednesday!)
• The SF Zoo’s “Just Because You Hot-Glued Fur To Your Bike Doesn’t Make It An Animal” free admission today (Wednesday!)
• Amnesia’s “Burning What? Happy Hour” (5-7pm Every day this week!)
• The Earth’s “You Don’t Have To Be In The Desert To Have Warm Weather” awesome SF weather forecast (Limited time offer!)

Do you want to protect your right to throw an alcoholic energy drink themed flash dance party in the park without being hassled by the po-po? Who doesn’t?

Well now is your chance to be heard in front of the people that make these decisions:

Dolores Park Works has organized a community meeting to discuss safety, law enforcement and 19th & Dolores has been set. The big day is just two days away, Wednesday, September 1st, from 6:00-8:00, at Mission High School cafeteria, which is located across from the tennis courts in Dolores Park (entrance to cafeteria off of Dolores & 18th).

We will be covering:

• 19^th & Dolores pedestrian safety & proposed changes
• Park patron safety and law enforcement

Get to work folks, you have about 30 hours to formulate a convincing argument about how we live in a police state and that NIMBYs are harshing your mellow, man. See you there!

More info at DPW, thanks to Andy B. for the gentle reminder

Just in case you’re like me and Banksy Fever™ still wasn’t enough for you to get out and see Exit Through the Gift Shop, it’s playing at the Roxie through Thursday. Showtimes are at 8:30pm.