Mission Mission

. . . at the ELBOW ROOM in Sparks, Nevada.  Better hurry before the Marina gets wind of this.

[photo by chartno3]

The next issue of Forum, the literary magazine published by City College of San Francisco, is coming out this May. If you are a CCSF student, faculty member or alumni you have until March 1st, 2010 to send your poems, essays, short stories, screenplays, visual artwork, photography or anything else you think they could fit onto a page to cityjournal(at)gmail(dot)com.

They are especially interested in artwork, so go get yourself published!

Photo credit: Scott Beale / Laughing Squid

An offer too good to be true?

We’ve got individual rooms for rent!—think college dorm-style, a long hallway down the middle with rooms on either side, shared bathrooms, shared toilets. Below, Zeitgeist is a vibrant bar with a sunny beer garden for SF summers. We’re looking for a few good additions to our tenant base who can appreciate the bustly setting below while also respecting the solitude of their fellow hotel mates above the bar. Two rooms are available this month, two more next, each approximately 10′ x 10′. Electrical, water, and free Internet access are all included. We require a $600 security deposit, a $50 key deposit, and first month’s rent at lease signing. Here’s another cool thing: drugs are absolutely not tolerated, but well-behaved pets are. We’re dog and cat friendly. Background checks and credit checks will be run on all applicants, if only because the harmony of our living space is important to us. Interested? Please come by the bar and fill out an application or, better yet, make an appointment by contacting out resident property manager at: timeghost11@gmail.com.

I love the part about how “drugs are absolutely not tolerated.”  I’ll remember that the next time a coked-out bartender yells at me for only ordering two bloody marys.  On the other hand, you’ll be in perfect position to observe what I call the “Zeitgeist Paradox,” which postulates that on nice and sunny SF days when it seems as though it would be perfect to hang out at Zeitgeist, in actuality you don’t want to go anywhere near Zeitgeist because it’s packed to hell in there.

Zeitgeist Paradox Null-Hypothesis

And of course, if the city has their way, you won’t have to worry about smoke wafting up from the courtyard anymore either!  Burger fumes are another story, but only Vegansaurus would have a problem with that.  I also want to put on record that I really really wish my email address was timeghost11.  Totally fucked that one up.

Oh, and are you wondering how I shot all these pictures in the Zeitgeist courtyard without getting tossed?

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This video is going to catapult someone to stardom.

That someone will probably be Myles Cooper, whose exploits we’ve been following for a while now. Most recently, Myles did some time as a Boy George impersonator. Before that, he was Myles the Free Barber. And we won’t soon forget his performances in such viral video classics as Gay Bath Fail and How Myles Got Dumped.

Today we just might be looking at the pinnacle of Myles’ myriad achievements thus far. Gonna Find Boyfriends Today is a joyous new video for a joyous new song. Director Skye Thorstenson is due a fair share of the credit too, but Myles is the man. And Mission Mission is proud to say it got the scoop straight from the horse’s mouth late last night:

Allan: Your new video is NUTS. Where’d you get the director?

Myles: I met Skye at a gay pot luck.

And how did you all come up with this CRAZY video?

Skye came up with most of the imagery and built all the puppets and animations. There were a few things I really wanted like a Precious Moments boys choir, a Latin drummer and the scene with my shirt being ripped off like the Right Said Fred video “I’m Too Sexy.”  Skye was happy to create all of that and a lot more from his imagination.

Couldn’t have done it without the song though. ‘Sup with it?

The song came to me in August when I was staying at an apartment in Washington Heights, the neighborhood in Manhattan. I was staying with my friend who is a hard-working singer. It is where a lot of people who work in theater live, so you can hear people practicing trombones, flutes or whatever. It’s pretty inspiring and totally not punk rock. I take Ambien to sleep, and one night I dangerously and unknowing stayed awake and somehow made a YouTube video of me singing this song. I woke up in the morning with no recollection of making the video. I erased the video and started to work out the instrumentation when I got back to San Francisco. It took a long time to program, and a long time to make the video, but I feel it was all worth it.

No doubt! When’s your album drop!?

Yes, I am working on an album. But first I want to release a few songs as singles. Optimally the “Gonna Find Boyfriends Today” single is gonna have the radio edit, an extended mix and a Spanish version on 12″ vinyl.

How will you perform this jam live? And who is in your band?

I perform this song live now, and the setup of the live show is always evolving. I am creating a huge family band called Myles Cooper USA. Right now my friend Ryan Froemming plays keyboard while my bestie Alexis Blair Penney sings backups. I sing and do live drum machine stuff on my Atari Mega ST 2 music computer. The computer is over 20 years old so it’s a trip to see on stage. People go crazy. We mix in a few backing tracks in at random moments as we don’t have enough people in the band yet.

NOTE: Looks like Myles Cooper USA is playing TONIGHT at El Rio! Lucky us!

Everything Is Everything just published a photo series called Food and Drink in the Mission and it alllll looks good.

(Vegans, I put “Skinless Beef Feet” right there in the title just for you. You can’t call foul.)

You guys remember Food Not Bombs, right?  They were those folks who were always getting kicked out of People’s Park or arrested for feeding homeless people.  You know, domestic terrorism or some shit like that.

Well, now you can experience all that edgy activism yourself without having to listen to a Fifteen album because Mission Street Food is hosting Vegan Night for Food Not Bombs at the usual spot, Lung Shan Restaurant at 2234 Mission.  Everything is between $5-9.  Leave your cynicism at the door for an evening!  PS.  I think they are still taking donations . . .

Some Highlights:

cassava fritters and panisse cakes with guacamole – $8
roasted kale, king trumpet, fried nagaimo, braised cashews, shallot soubise – $9
black garlic stuffed tofu, beluga lentils, wild arugula, preserved lemon – $8.5

Oh, and for a little extra credit, be sure to check out the Cometbus art exhibit at 1-2-3-4 Go! Records in Oakland.  Nobody does art with a Xerox machine that was kicked down three flights of stairs better!

Hey, stop playing an ironic version of “Smoke on the Water” on that oud (it sounds better on the shamisen, anyway). It’s time to take it to the next level and learn to play in Turkish 9/8.

Zambaleta is a new music and dance school on 19th and Florida. The are offering a free five days of music classes in early March. Here’s the scoop:

If you could play all the music in the world, where would you begin? We’re not there yet, but we have put together 50 classes for you to find that one sound you’ve always wanted to make. From March 1st to March 5th, you can come and try any of these classes for free and decide whether you want to go down that one road. So come to one, come to fifty. Bring your friends and your grandmothers. We love to hear you play.

Among the 50 (!) classes being offered next month are:

• DJ I with DJ Lamont Young
• Balkan Brass Ensemble with Gregory Jenkins
• Composing Without Your Brain with Cornelius Boots
• Indian Classical Theory with Gautam Tejas Ganeshan

Check it out, there are a lot more classes for instruments whose names I can’t even begin to pronounce, as well as more exotic stuff like “Blues Guitar”.

Shitty Kitty is back from Morocco!

“As always, Telephone and Soup will bring the comic-making supplies, you bring your friends and shittiest ideas.”

Shotwells (@20th), Tonight (Thursday the 18th), 6pm til late night burrito time

Red Choo Choo found these somewhere on Florida Street. I wonder if the property owner likes them.

Three more long faces after the jump:

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Hmm, what’s this?  The flag of some breakaway Soviet republic?  Fabricstan?

Nope — just a Levi’s ad…

…tacked up to the windows of Groger’s Western Store on Valencia & 26th.

Guess that explains the burnt orange bicycles and lavender sawhorse (which is now gone). For a minute I though Levi’s was opening up a store on Valencia. La Lengua would welcome you with open arms.

But you have to admit it’s rather appropriate for Groger’s.  Though I really don’t know which of those colors would go best with a brushpopper shirt.