No dis-ASS-emble Johnny Five

Our pal Xtinal got to tour the armory and spotted an “upgraded” Johnny 5. Times must be tough, even for escaped sentient Nova robots. We know he can feel love, but can he feel… you know… pleasure?

BTW, have you seen the El Debarge video for “Who’s Johnny”? Total disappointment. They clearly didn’t have the budget to hire the robot or Steve Guttenberg, so they just put a cardboard cutout of Steve and a lame puppet robot arm into a few shots. The song still holds up and they did manage to cast the ultra-cute Ally Sheedy, though:

[via Xtinalrichards]

Mission Loc@l visits

One of the squeaky-clean kids over at Mission Loc@l dressed up in his Sunday best and showed up filming of’s “Public Disgrace”, a groundbreaking independent web video series.

Here’s a snippet:

“Let’s review the rules,” she says into a bullhorn from the center of the circle.

In more explicit language, she says that if you plan to participate, please wash your hands.

“The bathroom is over there,” she adds.

She looks back down at her list of rules.

“That’s it.”

The crowd laughs. I gulp.

Eventually, he caught on:

I’m getting it now: is filming a porno/sex party, and we are the extras. I knew from the release form that there would be cameras at the event, but I now understand that this is really part of an adult video shoot, and the guests are the public part of the “public disgrace.”

How precious.

Read on, and if you watch the episode later, keep your eye out for a dude in a wool suit holding a notepad.

[photo, story via Mission Loc@l]

Spiderclam, Planet of the Gapes, Freaks and Dicks

Apparently James Franco is a big fan of — so big in fact, that he’s directing a documentary on the famed porn castle, and production has already started.

So what was it like when Franco came to the Mission? Indiewire has the details:

A tweet from actress rain degrey from June 26 read: “ is all aflutter today because James Franco is here shooting his new movie. All these girls want to f*ck him! lol.”

Expect more James Franco in the Mission in the coming months, and maybe you’ll get to f*ck him if you’re lucky.

Previously: at Arinell (NSFW)

I think Steve Jobs took this photo when he stopped by

San Francisco’s finest pizza and porn, together at last.  Kind of like a frat party.  So far, the Kink crew has hit up the Knockout and, allegedly, the Kilowatt.  Where will they be next?  Smart money’s on Benders.

(Thanks to, ummm, Robert for the tip–yeah, that’s the ticket)

[Photos and Video from, both probably NSFW]

Just don’t try from an iPad.


Kink at the Knockout (NSFW)

The Tens Takes You Inside The Armory

Anti-Porn Bias Costs Kink Cash

Pre-Internet Armory

Breaking Pizza News at Arinell Peeping Tom

Isn’t there a better way to get a peak inside the armory?  I realize that a certain Belle & Sebastian video may have suggested that this is the way to go, but do you really want to end up as the office piece of fluff?

Maybe you do.


The Tens Takes You Inside The Armory

Another Glimpse Inside The Armory… From Margaret Cho?!

Pre-Internet Armory

Pre-Internet Armory

Back when the Armory was still an armory?  Favorite comment so far:

how the hell did you get old cars to park there…oh wait nevermind.

Woodward between 14th and Duboce, 1976

[Photo by Dave Glass]


The Tens Takes You Inside The Armory Mad Libs!

The Tens Takes You Inside The Armory

As we found out earlier this week, the free friday tours of the Armory are booked up until the fall so it’s going to be a while until we’ll get see all the glorious historical significance inside. Luckily for you, tonight our favorite DSLR-slinger from the Tens somehow got some kind of private tour with his “company”, which I can only assume is a custom power-tool supplier.

Anyway, he snapped this gem and a handful of pictures of good clean adult fun. Check out the full set on the Tens:

Jealous? I am. When I tried to flex my dubious, “Uhh, is there a press guest list? I kinda sorta write for a local blog” card, it fell on deaf ears at the Armory. But who could blame them? They don’t really need the press and we are but a humble blog that has recently been rewarded for pictures of public shitting. On the other hand, a significant portion of our traffic comes from dudes googling Sasha Grey, so maybe it would be good for business?

Well, if you change your mind,, you know where to find us.

Update: Brizz posted more pics, including Johnny Five with some, umm, upgrades, on Uptown Almanac.

Happy St. Patrick's Day from

Sure, it’s a little late, but it’s the thought that counts.  Besides, look at that adorable couple down there who just left the building!  I wonder what they are saying to each other . . . Mad Libs!!!

“My favorite part was when ___1___ put you in that ___2___ and started to ___3___ you.”

“Yeah, I didn’t think ___4___ would be able to fit ___5___ in my ___6___, but you gotta admit, they are professionals over here.”

“I just wish they didn’t rub ___7___ all over my face.  I felt that was unnecessary.”

“I know, and all we got were these matching hoodies.”

If you want, number your responses in the comments.  Entries will be judged based on ___8___, and the winner will receive ___9___.  I am totally convinced that this is not a bad idea.