Mission Mission

Yo dawg, I heard you like less stabbing and lunch money stealing in your BART station so we took a 2.1 million dollar grant and removed those planter boxes.

SF Appeal reports:

On Thursday, the transit company is scheduled to accept a $2.1 million grant from the Metropolitan Transportation Commission, as reported by the Ex. This money will go toward making the Mission district station cleaner and, they say, more secure for those that use it.

Get the full scoop at SF Appeal.

I’m not sure what’s going on here, but my guess is that the bald dude tried to use savesies to score that parking spot and the questionably-Hawaiian dude was not too happy about it.

Seriously, don’t fight folks. Let’s settle our differences like everyone else does these days: by posting quasi-anonymous comments to one another on the internet until someone tells us both to shut up.

Previously:

There Are No Savesies

Dolores Park Works got a letter from the SFMTA indicating that STOP signs on 19th and Dolores are inappropriate:

“STOP signs are primarily used to define right-of-way where it may be unclear. This intersection is presently controlled by a STOP sign on 19th [on Cumberland], thus vehicles on this street must stop and yield…installation of an all-way STOP could also lead to incomplete stops and increase potential for rear-end and collisions.”

So STOP signs are inappropriate because there is already a STOP sign on 19th and Cumberland, two streets that are actually parallel. Is this an elaborate math problem in which we are to assume Dolores Park exists in a non-Euclidean space?

Furthermore, STOP signs aren’t appropriate because the assumption is that cars generally don’t stop at them and the ones that do will get into rear-end accidents. Things really must have really gone downhill since I took my written drivers license exam when I was 15 and a half. I guess it’s time I got a new DMV handbook.

Get the full scoop at DPW.

Lighting up at Valencia near 15th.

Shoes-on-wire art is gonna be huge. What better way is there to get your name out and indicate that you can buy crack on this block?

Previously:

Hobo Oddfellow

Oddfellow’s First Appearance in Tales of the Mission Issue #16

Cone in a Hole and Other Codes of the City

Great news for cyclists:  the Bike Plan Injunction that has prevented new bike lanes from being painted in the City for the past 4 years has finally been overturned.  Naturally, this means more cyclist lanes and safer riding for everyone (vehicles and pedestrians included). 

Renée Rivera of the San Francisco Bicycle Coalition, for one, was happy to hear the news:

San Francisco is seeing firsthand how improvements like the green, fully separated bike lanes on Market Street are increasing everyone’s safety and comfort and attracting more people biking.

While there are a number of projects already lined-up for striping (pun intended), I’m sure they could always use a few more suggestions.  So, what streets in the Mission (or elsewhere) do you think would be best served by the addition of a new bicycle lane (and don’t say Guerrero or South Van Ness–let’s at least let the cars keep those or they’ll get all fussy)?

Strollers down Valencia Street this weekend were greeted by a friendly individual hawking Volkswagen-made grilled cheese sandwiches.  Mozzarella and sharp cheddar on marbled rye with healthy slices of tomato and avocado.

How much do they cost? “However much you got, man.”  Well then, I happen to have $3.  “Awesome, have some extra avocado!”  I didn’t possess the constitution necessary to attempt the homemade absinthe, however.

It was a pretty classy setup inside, with linoleum flooring and various amenities including a sink and sizable hot plate grill.  Blue Oyster Cult blared from the speakers, completing the scene.  Even if I was possibly contributing to this fellow’s Burning Man fund, that grilled cheese sure hit the spot.

In case you missed it yesterday, here is the entire 6-minute Boxwars 2010 battle filmed on top of the green storage container by a couple of dudes who are laughing really hard. The cardboard samurai clearly has formal sword training. Too bad the giraffe went down so quick.

[photo by slowpoke_sf; video by nud021]

Previously:

Boxwars 2010!

Boxwars 2008!

Yummm.  The salivating aroma of bacon wafted out of a doorway normally reserved for the vilest odors.  Inside, clever hobo ingenuity conspired to craft a warm, delicious breakfast.  I took advantage of the opportunity and recharged my phone.

Excuse me, miss. I love your coat. Where did you steal it from?

[via Sex Pigeon]