Mission Mission

Our pal Corntard overheard one important theory:

Yeah but with Bill Murray, and Aziz.

(Bender’s rules!)

[link]

The other day I was reminiscing with my buddy Jay Beaman about what it was like to see the Fucking Champs at 12 Galaxies right here in the Mission.

The Fucking Champs were sort of a metal band for non-metal-heads I guess? One serious metal fan laughed at me when I said I was a fan, explaining that the Champs were “hipster metal.” I was like, wellllll whatever you want to call it I fucking loooove it.

12 Galaxies was a gloriously scuzzy rock club in the spot on Mission near 22nd that is now called Balançoire. During the early-to-mid ’00s they booked seemingly every band I cared about, and they had cool wraparound mezzanine. It was probably the first place during my tenure in the Mission whose closure hit me really hard (other than KFC).

I was telling Jay that one of my favorite memories was during the period where Bender’s was closed and in limbo after being firebombed. Johnny Davis from Bender’s, one of my all-time favorite bartenders, had picked up a shift or two at Doc’s Clock (right next door to 12 Galaxies) and so I’d walk over there early, buy a drink from Johnny, go see a band, pop back over and buy a shot from Johnny, go back and see the next band, go back and do another shot, etc. etc. until last call. Gooooood times.

I’m pretty sure this was one of those nights:

This all started when I sang 45 songs in May and wanted to brag about it, but also, I just wholeheartedly want to give props to the local karaoke scene (and karaoke scenes around the world) for making me feel so good all the time. This month I sang an Ian Dury song for goodness’ sake! Can you imagine!?

1. I Will Follow — U2
2. Hit Me with Your Rhythm Stick — Ian Dury
3. All My Friends — LCD Soundsystem
4. Ape Man — The Kinks
5. Leave It Alone — NOFX
6. Perfect Day — Lou Reed
7. Could You Be Loved — Bob Marley
8. It’s Oh So Quiet — Björk
9. Tubthumping — Chumbawumba
10. Pompeii — Bastille
11. Boots — Nancy Sinatra
12. Wannabe — Spice Girls

In particular, I want to mention KJ Eileen, who, in a crazy twist, doesn’t have a website! I think she does last Fridays of the month at Bender’s and some Sundays at Maggie McGarry’s in North Beach? Anyway thanks to her I got to sing the Kinks, NOFX and Lou Reed in one 2-hour period! I couldn’t believe my luck!

Also, “Pompeii” is exactly as fun as you’d imagine. Thanks, DJ Purple!

In no particular order:

1. The Devil Burger at St. Francis Fountain — I usually get it with bacon and cheddar, and sub real mayonnaise for the veganaise, but I bet it’s super good actually vegan too. Afterward, I feel like I ate an awesome burger. (Good fries and cold Anchor Steams too.) (I ate one of these last night and am still thinking about it, mmmmmm.)
2. Golden Beetloaf sandwich at Atlas Cafe — It has gouda and mayo, so it’s probably not vegan, but maybe it can be made vegan? I dunno. (If not, there are plenty of other good veggie sandwiches at this place that probably can be vegan?) Anyway, CLASSIC sandwich. It doesn’t really pretend to be a meat. It has a really special set of textures and a really special set of flavors all its own. I usually get it to go and grab some cheddar Popchips from Norm’s to accompany it in a picnic in my backyard.
3. The Vegan Burger at Mission Bowling Club — Definitely vegan, and I don’t even add bacon to it or anything. (Usually I go with a friend and split one of these and one real burger.) (The legendary Mission Burger, mmmm.) It’s legendary, and really good.
4. Satan’s Philly Cheese Fake at Bender’s — Can be made vegan with vegan dressing instead of cheese, but omgggg is it good with cheese. Better than most real Philly cheesesteak sandwiches, I’d say, and it comes with tots! Goes great with Death & Taxes btw.
5. The veggie sandwich of the day at Pal’s Take-Away (pictured) — When you want a big, expertly assembled pile of beautiful vegetables on some gorgeous fresh-baked bread, Pal’s is the place. There’s usually an egg on it, which is clutch, but you can ask for it without if you want. A+ sandwich. (Even if it’s not asparagus season anymore.)

Bummerdude

[via The Fog Bender and SF Weekly]

[via The Fog Bender]

Brittany & Katie went to a show at Z-Below, and they seemed to have appreciated it, though not quite to the point of actual enjoyment . . .

Pictured left to right: Tamar Cohn as Kay, Craig Souza as Carpenter, Donald Currie as Auden, Justin Lucas as Stuart, Kathryn Wood as George, and John Fisher as Britten in The Habit of Art by Alan Bennett, directed by John Fisher, a Theatre Rhinoceros production at Z Below
Photo by Kent Taylor.

Theater Rhinoceros, the (self-proclaimed) oldest queer theater in America, has a mission to “produce works of theatre that enlighten, enrich, and explore both the ordinary and extraordinary aspects of our queer community.” Although the description of Allen Bennett’s play The Habit of Art about British poet, W. H. Auden, and British composer Benjamin Britten, didn’t have us rushing to the box office, we were intrigued to see if the playwright who brought us The History Boys had an equally witty and enlightening take on what could be a very dry topic. So we returned to one of our favorite mission theater venues, Z-Below, to see what Theater Rhino had in store.

Brittany: It was very arty. The whole play within a play thing was interesting, but despite some strong actors, I don’t think they made the play within a play thing work. Some of my favorite moments were when they pulled back to the focus on the rehearsal, so I enjoyed it as a device, but they didn’t real nail it for me.

Katie: I really struggled through the first act, especially when they were acting like actors that didn’t know their lines and standing up there with scripts. I think the actors did the best with what they were given, but sometimes they would go in and out of their English accents and that was a little distracting to me. Jumping in and out of the play to the “rehearsal” gave me whiplash.

B: I think the other thing that’s hard is that the play they were rehearsing wasn’t a very good play, at least in my opinion. I really liked the woman who played the stage manager though (Tamar Cohn), she was great and her monologue at the end was really touching.

K: I wouldn’t say it was a bad production, I just feel that this show is for a theater person. If I sent my non-theater-going friends to this show they would never trust me again.

B: Yeah, some of the most charming jokes or scenes were the ones that were so specific that non-theater people wouldn’t get them. Definitely not a show for everyone.

The Verdict: If you’re a theater person, you’ll probably find the play within a play element of this show intriguing, and you’ll get all the rehearsal related jokes. If you’re familiar with W.H. Auden or Benjamin Britten, you’ll probably find this insight into their relationship, and their personal lives, interesting. Otherwise, skip it, this probably is not the show for you.

The Drama Talk: The play within the play is full of poetry, music and theatricality. An interesting story about two aging artists, no longer in their prime, and the young men who helped feed their artistic temperament (AKA male prostitutes and pre-pubescent choir boys). Jumping between the story found in the play, and the rehearsal of that play, made the emotional through line fall short (as Katie said, whiplash inducing). The rehearsal elements of the show, however, are some of the most endearing and are definitely where the humor is found. Despite some strong actors, and a well designed set that makes the sometimes cramped theater feel much bigger, this piece falls into the category of only-for-the-artsy-types.

The Drinks: We went to nearby Benders for their free afternoon Sunday BBQ. Brittany got a dirty martini (since they were drinking martinis during the show) and Katie got her usual rum and coke. What better way to unpack an highbrow play than with some lowbrow BBQ.

Tickets can be purchased here.

You guys, Looking season finale! Our first season is over, and everyone you thought would hookup DOES! The show decided to avalanche us with some serious shit in the last few episodes, a reward for those who stuck around.

Patrick and Richie are on the outs, remember? The episode opens with Patrick visiting Richie at work because he isn’t returning his calls, and the reception isn’t warm — he’ll call him when he’s ready. Meanwhile, Patrick’s also dealing with boss Kevin, who won’t stop apologizing for trying to kiss him at the wedding, something Patrick is trying to move past quickly. He got other shit going on, you know?

Agustin and Frank are on the outs, remember? Not much progress has been made since last week; Frank wants Agustin to move out on account of the paying the Thor-like CJ for sex, and the decision seems final. Frank even goes so far as to criticize Agustin’s art, calling his shit the musings of a bored rich kid, telling him if he ever follows through with anything, it’ll be mediocre at best. Daaaaaang. Agustin leaves, decides to go on a bender, he chases some pills with kombucha (hee hee) on BART; Patrick runs into him later kinda lying about outside of Dom’s Portuguese chicken startup’s pop-up night.

Dom and Lynn are on the outs, remember? We see Dom running around getting ready for his big night, nervous Lynn won’t make it. When Bakula finally does happen, we see him with a bearded man, potentially a date. Dom clearly isn’t into it, and Doris knows it. We don’t talk about Doris much in these recaps because, in the words of someone like Doris, I just CAN’T — but in this episode she has her moment, telling Lynn that despite all, Dom is worth it. She’s talking about his brattiness as a business partner, sure, but really she’s talking ROMANCE, you guys.

In the dining room, Patrick and Agustin are catching up about P’s woes, when P gets a call from Kevin to come into work. When he gets there, you guys won’t even believe it: Kevin doesn’t even actually need his help on anything! What ensues is your textbook love (lust?) confession: it takes so much effort not to kiss you, I can’t stop thinking about you, THE WORKS (we’ve all been there). Kev goes in for the kiss and while Patrick is initially hesitant, they obviously end up making out, getting naked, THE WORKS. I would go into more detail but what am I, the writer of gay erotica? Get your rocks off elsewhere, reader, I barely understand how this stuff works.

Back at the Portuguese chicken startup pop-up, Dom pulls Lynn aside and apologizes to him for being a dick, Lynn says there’s no need. Dom tells him he hopes they can continue doing something “more permanent,” Lynn thinks they should end their working relationship, Dom goes in for a kiss. Hey buddy! I think we’re talking ROMANCE, you guys.

Later, we catch up with Patrick on his walk of shame home, where he runs into Richie hoping to talk. What ensues is a heartbreaking speech from Richie, about how he’s working through his pride, about how they’re both sensitive about where he’s from, about how he’s thisclose to falling in love with Patrick but he won’t do it if P isn’t ready. Patrick isn’t ready. Tears fall, and by the way, have you ever watched a show where a relationship was this layered? We’re talking insecurities, class issues, emotional immaturity, and it’s all gives your dumb bouncy ball heart a squeeze and a toss.

The show ends with Patrick coming home to Agustin asleep in front of his laptop watching Golden Girls (we’ve all been there). Patrick sits down, starts watching alongside him, and Thank You For Being a Friend plays us out. We are essentially back where we started, with the boys as roommates.

So that’s it for season 1 of Looking! If this was meant to be a show with interesting, complex characters living in San Francisco, whose stories were interesting regardless of them being gay, then mission accomplished. I am intrigued by how casual it all was; I’m glad we all stuck to it, and I’m glad our city has its own show now. Filming for season 2 begins later this year, so please text a babe if you run into Jonathan Groff in the Mission because I just love the way his eyes light up like a Disney prince and I’d like to see that in person.

Okay, now everyone go catch up on True Detective, you’ve earned it.

Spotted in this episode: Willy’s Barber Shop on 22nd and Bartlett, the front of the Make-Out Room, BART, Punjab Restaurant (again).

1. Truckload of ice:

2. Snow hose:

[via The Fog Bender]

Today’s a big day for our boy Burrito Justice! Tonight there’s an in-person event at Bender’s:

Bikes to Books Beer Social!

Wednesday, March 5, 7-9 pm

Benders Bar and Grill
806 S. Van Ness, SF

Join Nicole Gluckstern and Burrito Justice, the creators of literary bicycle tour “Bikes to Books,” for an evening of socializing, beer drinking, and map chat at awesome local watering hole Benders on Wednesday, March 5, from 7-9 pm. We’ll be talking up our collaborative map project including new developments, fielding questions, and enjoying some tasty adult beverages in the first of a series of “Bikes to Books” events and meetups planned for 2014. [link]

Awesome! And before that, like RIGHT NOW, Burrito and Nicole Gluckstern are live on BFF.fm for this week’s edition of Burrito Justice Radio. Tune in: http://BFF.fm